If This Is Your Favorite Food, Science Says You Probably Have A Pretty Good Love Life

Break out the Gouda, it's time to talk about intimacy, well, the correlation between intimacy and cheese, which are not the same thing. I never thought I'd see the day as a writer that I would be able to combine what I do for a living with one of my greatest pleasures: melted cheese.

Thankfully, the world is weird, and people who eat grilled cheese are awesome, and so here we are, and people need answers on how something so good can exist, and how it affects us.

If grilled cheese is your favorite food, science says you probably have a pretty good love life.

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When you think of a grilled cheese sandwich, you don't necessarily think of having better intimacy. Rest assured, this article is not about to change that. While I don't hate the idea of writing a post about the best positions for eating sandwiches, that's not what we're here to do today. 

What do you think of when you contemplate a grilled cheese sandwich? You probably think of toasted bread, golden butter, and stretchy, delicious melted cheese. While that does paint an enticing picture to be sure, it doesn't seem to have anything to do with intimacy, right? WRONG! 

For reasons heretofore unknown to me, nature, and science, the dating site Skout ran a poll on its grilled cheese-loving members and found out that they have better love lives than those who shudder at the sight of one of God's greatest creations. 

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According to the research, people who love grilled cheese sandwiches are much more active in the bedroom than those who dislike the sandwich.

Skout polled 4,600 people and found that 73% of grilled cheese lovers are intimate at least once a month, compared with 63% of those who don’t love grilled cheese. And 32% of grilled cheese lovers are intimate at least six times a month, compared with 27% of non-grilled cheese lovers.

But the good news doesn't stop there. The next time your friends try to stage a cheese intervention with you (so like, probably later today if you are anything like me), you can tell them that not only are you getting frisky a lot more than they are, but you are also more generous than the average person. 

81% of grilled cheese fans polled have donated money, food, or time to a charity or a person who was in need. Take that, cheese haters! You want to talk about heart health, huh?

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Like pizza, anyone who dislikes a grilled cheese sandwich is highly suspect.

Okay, maybe that's a bit of a stretch ... see what I did there? Cheese pull ... stretch? Anyway, in my opinion, even dietary restrictions cannot take away from the absolute deliciousness of a grilled cheese sandwich. In the same way I find it very difficult to trust a person who doesn't like pizza, I feel equally passionate about cheese haters.

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As Vice reporter Joel Golby so eloquently put it, "There is no earthly reason to not enjoy a grilled cheese sandwich. And that includes those with specific dietary requirements — after a series of incredibly tiresome conversations with my vegan cousin, I now know they are making real strides in dairy-free cheese ('They’ve almost figured out how to make it melt instead of sweat' is an actual sentence I have had to listen to at a party, multiple times). Gluten-free bread isn’t even considered the dirt worst anymore. Who is still conspiring to not like grilled cheese?"

Obviously, this isn't like medical science, but here's my theory: Think about how many options there are when it comes to a grilled cheese sandwich. The cheese and bread combinations alone are staggering. Don't forget condiments, too. From ketchup to hot sauce, the options are endless, and maybe that's what makes grilled cheese fans so eager in the romance department. They are willing to not only indulge in decadence but also try new things all the time. Variety is the spice of life after all.

Clearly, my heart health is doing just fine between all the intimacy, cheddar, and do-gooding, and to help celebrate, I'll indulge in a cheddar-like snack later today. Viva la fromage, and stay frisky friends by enjoying more cheese!

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Rebecca Jane Stokes is a writer and the former Senior Editor of Pop Culture at Newsweek with a passion for lifestyle, geek news, and true crime.