11 Things Happy Couples Do Before 9AM
Making sure to take the time for some simple habits early each morning is a great way to keep the love in your relationship alive.
Prostock-studio / Shutterstock Relationships aren't always easy. Even for couples that seemed destined to stay together forever, there almost always seems to be some invisible force that threatens to tear them apart. That being said, there are things happy couples do before 9 AM that make their relationship last the longest.
From greeting one another with a smile to being affectionate, these are small but impactful ways couples can ensure their relationship not only lasts but is a whole lot of fun along the way. Are these things easy to do every single day? Not always. However, with consistency, trying to keep up with these habits will improve any relationship for the better.
11 things happy couples do before 9 AM
1. They greet one another affectionately
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The first thing happy couples do before 9 AM is greet one another affectionately. When couples wake up, it's typical to groan, roll over, and sigh in annoyance. Let's face it: not everyone is a morning person. Most people don't want to talk in the morning, let alone be affectionate.
However, there's a need for couples to be affectionate with one another as much as possible. According to research, people who hugged more had a better mood and felt less lonely. That being said, don't just say 'Good morning' and roll over.
It's important to truly be loving and to use a sweet tone with one another. People can pick up on if their partner sounds annoyed or unenthused, so be sincere, or at the very least, hug one another and kiss each other once one person wakes up.
2. They check in on one another emotionally
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When couples talk in the morning, it's often about bills or what their schedule is looking like for the day. However, a thing happy couples do before 9 AM is check in on one another emotionally. Some people might consider it cringeworthy, but checking in on one another truly is important for making a relationship last long. It's easy to forget, but couples need to feel heard to feel loved.
According to Professor of Psychology, Todd Nelson, Ph.D., "So people have a strong desire to be with others. But, more than that, within those relationships, they want to feel like they are respected and understood."
That being said, it doesn't need to be difficult. Using a softer tone of voice, asking, "How are you feeling this morning? Did you sleep well?" is a way to check in on one another without doing too much.
3. They exchange thoughtful compliments
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Sure, couples might compliment one another on their hair in the morning or on the outfit they have on, however, a thing happy couples do before 9 AM is exchange thoughtful compliments. Everyone wants to feel heard and seen in their relationship. Despite what their partner might say, it feels good to be acknowledged and praised by someone they adore.
That being said, there's something extra special about exchanging a thoughtful compliment versus a surface-level compliment. For instance, being supportive and saying, "You make every morning worth it just by being next to me," is both a heartfelt and touching compliment that can make the grumpiest of partners pop a smile.
This is important, as kind and sweet words such as this are bound to make the relationship stronger. According to Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, people who received compliments felt happier, pleased, and flattered. Additionally, the research revealed that despite this positive impact, the givers often underestimated the impact these compliments had on the receiver, causing them to not engage in this social behavior.
So, while it might be frustrating to have to come up with something before 9 AM, try to do this at least a few times a week. Acknowledging one's partner is crucial for the longevity of any relationship.
4. They practice gratitude together
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When's the last time someone expressed gratitude towards their partner, especially early in the morning? Most likely, it's been a while as life becomes busier and couples slowly begin to take the little things for granted. However, a thing happy couples do before 9 AM is they practice gratitude together.
It doesn't need to be a whole essay, but practicing gratitude is essential for happiness overall. According to Harvard Health, "Gratitude helps people feel more positive emotions, relish good experiences, improve their health, deal with adversity, and build strong relationships." That being said, rarely do people practice gratitude in their daily lives. Whether it's taking for granted that cup of coffee their partner made them or coming home to a clean house, it's the little things that matter most.
So, always be appreciative and figure out one thing each party is grateful for before they leave that door. Even if it's something simple like, "Thank you for washing the dishes, I really appreciate it," doing those small things is the difference between an average relationship and a thriving one.
5. They make the bed together
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Let's face it: barely anyone makes the bed in the morning. When someone's alarm comes blaring out, the last thing they want to do is get up in the morning and automatically be tasked with making the bed. However, a thing happy couples do before 9 AM is that they make the bed together.
Sure, it might not be the funniest thing in the world, but making the bed together is great for a multitude of reasons. Not only does it lead to a sharper mind and a tidy room, but it's also a great way to bond and work together as a team. According to Glenn Geher, Ph.D., "A key to truly loving relationships may be an emphasis on the relationship as a team and a downplaying of the 'what's in it for me' attitude."
That being said, it won't be an easy habit to get into. After spending years simply rolling out of bed and throwing on their clothes, suddenly taking the extra step to fix a bed sounds like the last thing anyone wants to do. However, even doing it two times a week is a good start.
6. They avoid screen time as much as possible
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It's become all too common for people to scroll on their phones first thing in the morning. However, a thing happy couples do before 9 AM is avoid screen time as much as possible. There are only so many hours in a day that couples get to spend with one another. Between school, work, family, friends, and appointments, it can be difficult to carve out one-on-one time when life gets in the way. This is why it's important for both parties to get off their phones and spend a little time reconnecting.
According to a study in 2021, using the phone too much is associated with self-esteem issues, difficulties in emotional regulation, impulsivity, and shyness. So, even if it's a pain, it doesn't change the fact that connection is the single best way to keep a relationship intact.
7. They make or share breakfast
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Many couples do activities separately in the morning. From showering to eating, many couples have a habit of simply not spending enough time together as a result of overstimulation. Still, this doesn't change the fact that a thing happy couples do before 9 AM is make or share breakfast.
It might seem slightly chaotic at first, but making or sharing breakfast is a simple way to spend time together without changing your schedule drastically. That being said, if one person feels uncomfortable cooking, they can take on a different role. Whether it's one person cleaning while the other person is cooking or whether they're staying there to chat, simply being in their vicinity is enough.
8. They ask one another how they can make each other happy today
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Most people don't typically ask their partners this question in the first place. However, if they want to be in a long-lasting relationship, a thing happy couples do before 9 AM is ask one another how they make each other happy today.
It doesn't take much to show one another that they care. By having a genuine desire to know how to make one another happy, it's easy for either partner to feel loved, cared for, and seen in the relationship. As most people know, it's important to meet one another's needs.
Gary W. Lewandowski Jr., Ph.D, explained, "According to Chapman, when partners' love languages align, they should enjoy a better relationship."
This is why asking what would make your partner happy is so important. While one partner might have an idea of what the other one needs, they won't ever truly know unless they ask.
9. They help one another get ready
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Understandably, people need their space from time to time. No one wants to feel as if someone is hovering over them or that their boundaries aren't being respected. Even so, a small thing couples do before 9 AM is help one another get ready.
Now, there's no need to use the bathroom together or even brush their teeth together. However, small things like helping them find their belt or packing their bag can make all the difference in the world.
10. They say 'I love you' at least once
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It might seem small, but a thing happy couples do before 9 AM is say, 'I love you,' at least once. Sure, actions might speak louder than words, but this doesn't mean that words don't matter. Words can either make or break a relationship if couples aren't careful.
It's important to say 'I love you' with genuine affection and sincerity. It's unfortunate, but too many couples say these words with zero warmth and meaning. So, if couples are committed to changing their habits to stay together, they should be sure that when those words come out of their mouth, they truly genuinely mean them, otherwise, it might come off as insincere.
11. They say goodbye with intention
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Finally, the last thing happy couples do before 9 AM is say goodbye with intention. Saying goodbye with intention doesn't have to be some heartfelt confession that would put Bridgerton to shame. However, it does involve a little bit of thought and some time out of their day.
For starters, it's important not to rush those goodbyes. Regardless of how bad traffic is, taking those extra thirty seconds can make all the difference in the world. From eye contact to hugging to praying to encouragement, putting positivity out there before they leave is sure to help both partners get through the day.
Marielisa Reyes is a writer with a bachelor's degree in psychology who covers self-help, relationships, career, family, and astrology topics.
