3 Simple Ways To Communicate WIth A Man Who Thinks Silence Is A Love Language
For the guy who clams up instead of speaking up, here's how to actually get him talking.
Vitaly Gariev | Unsplash We all know that communication in relationships is important for couples. If you don't know how to communicate effectively, don't expect your blossoming relationship to last. "The single biggest problem in communication is the illusion that it has taken place," said Nobel Prize-winner George Bernard Shaw.
There are a lot of reasons a man might not call, but a big one that will have any good guy running in the opposite direction is a woman who's not a good communicator. Having good communication means being authentic at all costs, even if it means losing a chance with him. He will know when you aren't being real, and no good man wants to be with a faker.
Here are 3 simple ways to communicate with a man who thinks silence is a love language:
1. Really listen when he talks
What does this look like? Sometimes it seems like you use your ears more than your mouth. When you're in a conversation, sometimes less is more. If there's silence over cocktails, you don't always have to fill up the space with a monologue.
Look in his eyes and connect with him. When it comes to shiny earrings and listening, bigger is always better. Learn to attract a man the right way by attracting him with your love.
A 2024 study explained that a large portion of relationship communication is nonverbal, including touch, eye contact, and body language. For a partner who expresses love nonverbally, attentive awareness of these cues can speak louder than words.
2. Let your body do the talking
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How you hold yourself in conversations says a lot about your values and personality. Men like to take up a lot of space. Do you want to compete with a guy? I don't think so unless you want to lose him faster than the speed of light. If you overdramatize your movements in a manly way, you'll become a competitor.
Don't do it. If you use the type of body language that attracts the type of men you like, you will lure in the right person by having good communication with your body language.
An article by James Madison University explained that nonverbal signals can carry more weight and be interpreted more quickly than verbal communication. For a partner who uses silence to feel close, your nonverbal communication provides critical reassurance that you are present, empathetic, and connected.
3. Be honest and direct
Communication in relationships is one of the biggest elements to building the kind of connections you really want, and one of the biggest dangers to a healthy relationship is game-playing. You can have fun when you're getting to know a new man, but you don't want to confuse him.
When he throws you the verbal communication ball, make sure to throw it back. If he asks you a question, answer honestly, and don't be vague. Men don't want to have to read between the lines to figure out what you really mean.
For example, if he asks if you like ice cream, but you're lactose-intolerant and just looking at it makes you sick, you don't have to give him all the gory details of what happened to your tummy the last time. Simply tell him, "It's really not my favorite, but I do love sorbet!"
It doesn't matter how good you look when speaking; what really matters is how to communicate effectively, and communication isn't just your words. It's the key to getting to know yourself, letting others see the real you, and getting the man of your dreams.
Dina Colada is an author, speaker, and dating coach who specializes in helping single women navigate the modern world of online dating. Her work has appeared on sites like Prevention, MSN, Women’s Health, Plenty of Fish, and Zoosk.
