The Science-Backed Way To Get A Date In Under 15 Minutes

A little charm goes a long way.

Last updated on Jun 06, 2025

Woman gets date in minutes. Eric Vieira | Unsplash
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If you're short on time, but out there in the dating world, then you probably want to get right to the point and land something for Friday night, right? I mean, you've been dating forever, and isn’t it high time to get the rest of your life started with your soulmate? I think so.

A study out of the University of Kansas has found that, if you play your cards right and flirt like a champ, you can score a date in 12 minutes. What flirting like a champ means, according to the results, is "Starting off being encouraging and complimentary, and ending by being expressive and using open palm gestures." 

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Then, voila! The date is secured, and you’re on the way to the altar. Well, sort of.

The science-backed way to get a date in under 15 minutes

man trying to get a date Prostock-studio / Shutterstock

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What the study found was that each minute of engagement counts. The researchers looked into the way 102 straight people interacted with each other, and how long it took for the other person to either become attracted or realize there was an attraction.

The first one to three minutes was devoted to making compliments combined with flirty glances, then from minute four to six, the complimenting continued, and talking with open palms, if the subject was interested, ensued. 

By minutes seven through nine, compliments ceased, but men gazed more while women let a secret or two slip, before closing out the final minutes with more open hands flapping around and joyfulness from women. See? Super easy, right?

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If at any point interest was lost, it was conveyed by the crossing of the legs, shrugging, or, for women, touching their own hair, because sometimes our hair is really that much more exciting than a guy. But the flirtation style that left a bad taste in the mouths of both men and women? Teasing. 

"The most fascinating thing for me was teasing for everybody, whatever style, was negative in regards to being attractive," noted chief researcher Dr. Jeffrey Hall. Creating distance, too, as in leaning back in one's chair, was also something that neither men nor women found attractive in someone they were just meeting.

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Takeaway? Well, besides not teasing and leaning away from the person in whom you're interested, Dr. Hall believes that if you're aware of how you flirt and what others find attractive in a way others flirt, those looking for love can hone their skills and up their game.

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Of course, this doesn't mean that every single man you run into tonight and try to work the 12-minute flirting technique on is going to go home with you, but you have to figure there are five 12-minute blocks in an hour, so if you play your cards right, you've got a shot at impressing at least someone. It's all about determination, open palms, and compliments. No problem, right?

RELATED: 20 Ways To Let A Guy Know You Like Him (In A Subtle, Flirty Way)

Amanda Chatel has been a wellness and relationship journalist for over a decade. Her work has been featured in Glamour, Shape, Self, and other outlets. 

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