8 Often Overlooked Traits You'll Only Find In A Seriously High-Value Man
Monkey Business Images | Shutterstock Finding a man who matches your values is really the only way a relationship will last, but not everything that's good in a partner is always obvious. Plenty of traits in high-value men, especially, are overlooked simply because they don't stand out.
These men bring joy and respect to your life, and that's not something to scoff at. In fact, it's a lot more important than whether his bank account is flush or his family has status. A man worthy of loving is constant and engaged in making the relationship work.
Only high-value men have these often overlooked traits:
1. They are comfortable making earnest apologies
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Obviously, someone’s relationships will thrive when they’re willing to take accountability. However, being willing to create closure and forgive, even when someone doesn’t always deserve it, is also intrinsically tied to personal well-being and mental health.
Great men don’t shut down when their behavior is called out. They don’t get defensive when their loved ones show complicated emotions. They don’t run when someone wants to have a hard conversation. They’re present and attuned to their emotions, so much so that they can share them with others. It’s more beautiful and necessary than most realize.
2. They don’t run from a challenge
We grow into resilient people when we face hardship head-on. That doesn’t mean we do it effortlessly or even feel comfortable doing it. It just means we’re willing to face a challenge, instead of avoiding it or running in the other direction.
Whether this kind of man is a friend or partner, it’s obvious that he’s secure enough in himself to appreciate a challenge, no matter the scale.
3. They aren't bothered by embarrassment
It’s not a bad thing to be embarrassed. In fact, it’s a wildly underexperienced and underexplored experience in our culture. When we feel discomfort when we’re trying something new, we’re growing. That’s the sign of someone who’s investing in themselves, without putting other people’s opinions above their own growth.
High-value men are quite obviously willing to grow, even when it’s strange and uncomfortable.
4. They’re comfortable being vulnerable and don't run from emotions
There’s so much nuance to the barriers that keep men from expressing their emotions, but it’s overcoming those obstacles that craft the best men. The emotionally intelligent man who shares his feelings earnestly. The man who reflects and apologizes. The man who owns up to what he’s feeling instead of playing into a facade for everyone else’s comfort.
These types of men are also comfortable letting others feel their emotions in front of them. They’re clearly open to listening and learning from someone else, even when they don’t always share the same beliefs. They support people’s emotions and make them feel safely heard, even if everyone around is clocked out or not listening.
5. They try things that they’re bad at
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What would happen if we didn’t demonize being a beginner at something? Everyone would be a little more open-minded, a lot more connected, and even closer to their best selves. We’re all so afraid to make mistakes or show people that we don’t know how to do something that we miss out on nearly every opportunity to find a new passion or learn a new skill.
Especially for men, in a culture where they feel forced to be steadfast in their strength, ironically, it’s being willing to make mistakes and try things they’re bad at that makes them truly great.
6. They show up without question
High-value men are consistent and reliable. You don’t have to second-guess if they’re going to show up to support you. They’re a rock.
They’re willing to inconvenience themselves for the sake of community. These men have such a strong sense of self not only because they invest in themselves but also because they cultivate and cling to the joy of good connections.
7. They’re willing to slow down
Living a slow, intentional life has all kinds of mental and physical health benefits. However, that’s not always why a high-value man lives mindfully. Being present helps him, but it also helps him show up better for anyone he cares about.
He’s more intentional and focused at work. He’s present and listening with his partner. He can express gratitude because he’s observant rather than just going through the motions. His appreciation for stillness and, sometimes, alone time also allows him to be introspective in a way not all men have the capacity for.
8. They appreciate the little things
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Men feel pressured to do it all, protect everyone, and succeed without ever showing fear or weakness. But a high-value man understands that there's more to life than a perfect house with a picket fence. The joy that fills the house is where it's at.
He focuses on what brings him joy and what creates value in his own unique life. Whether that’s slowing down for coffee in the morning or choosing to be a stay-at-home dad, he appreciates the little pieces that come together to make a happy life alongside his big aspirations.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a senior editorial strategist with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
