11 Masculine Traits Almost All Women Are Drawn To Whether They Realize It Or Not
These manly traits speak more loudly to women than you may think.
PeopleImages / Shutterstock While some may not want to admit it, most women are naturally drawn to masculine traits that demonstrate stability, emotional intelligence, and guidance in positive and healthy directions. They want a partner who can lead and guide them without being controlling and making them feel unheard.
Masculine energy that still values emotional sensitivity and a sense of understanding will likely draw in a woman. When she notices these masculine traits, she cannot help but develop an attraction to knowing the positive way they impact not only herself but also a committed relationship.
11 masculine traits almost all women are drawn to whether they realize it or not
1. Emotional vulnerability
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Most men are told to hide their emotions and remain strong even when they feel like breaking down. While this may be what men think women want, deep down, women are drawn to men who have no fear of being emotionally vulnerable.
What men may see as a weakness, women will view as a building block towards a healthy and authentic relationship. They are drawn to the masculine strength that radiates from a man who is willing to open up emotionally and be vulnerable enough to not only express his own feelings but also listen to hers.
Dianne Grande, Ph.D., a licensed clinical psychologist, points out that “It is only through allowing ourselves to be vulnerable that we can understand, feel empathy, forgive each other, and know that we are worthy of love and belonging. Emotional courage is sharing our feelings with those who are important to us and accepting their feelings as valid and important.”
2. Protectiveness without control
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Women have an undeniable desire to be protected by their partner. Whether they realize it or not, women are drawn to the masculine trait of protectiveness, but also prefer this trait to exclude controlling behavior.
When a partner becomes more possessive than protective, they exude controlling behavior, and a woman will have a harder time feeling the safety that she should from her partner’s protective instincts. She will be drawn to the security and respect that is a result of a partner being protective, but will be unattracted to signs of insecurity and controlling behavior.
A Beautiful Soul Holistic Counseling explains, “When someone is protective, they may check on you, make you feel loved and safe, and make sure that you are okay physically and emotionally. When someone is possessive, they may create distance between you and family or friends.” Protectiveness is rooted in a want for a partner’s well-being, while controlling and possessive behavior stems from internal conflicts a person is experiencing.
3. Good listening skills
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Everyone wants to be heard, no matter if they are spilling their deepest, most vulnerable feelings or just reflecting on the kind of day they have had. Women are no exception. In fact, they are drawn to good listening skills.
Women understand that a healthy relationship has the chance to blossom when it stems from active listening. “Listening validates your partner’s experiences and feelings. Whether they’re sharing a grievance or joy, feeling understood creates a sense of safety. This strengthens emotional connections and reduces stress in the relationship,” explains Nicole Trainer of Native Integrative Mental Health, a counseling and therapy company that takes a holistic approach to helping individuals. It is attractive when they know that someone who has good listening skills will make them feel understood and validated.
4. Decisiveness
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Women want a partner they can rely on and, in some ways, be guided by during uncertain moments. This causes them to be extremely drawn to the masculine trait of decisiveness.
When a partner or potential partner is capable of making confident decisions, is assertive, and leads in a dominant and inspiring way, women pick up on this behavior and are typically very attracted to it. This behavior exudes confidence and self-assurance, which women view as positive traits, as it suggests someone is a good leader who is also likely to be accomplished.
5. The ability to remain calm under pressure
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Most women want someone who is stable in times of chaos and makes them feel safe. This leads them to be very drawn to individuals who remain calm under pressure.
Not only do these individuals help guide a woman through a tough situation, but they also allow her an emotionally safe place to express how she is feeling and calmly work through her emotions. A partner who breaks under pressure and acts angrily or is too stressed out will only heighten her own stress. She is drawn to someone who will help balance out her own emotions.
6. Leadership
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While women don't typically want to be told what to do or how to live, they do enjoy the presence of a partner who understands how to create a sense of security for them, provide protection, and take initiative. These are key reasons why women are often drawn to masculine leadership.
When they believe their partner can take charge and initiative in various aspects of the relationship, women will start to realize that they can rely on their partner. They want someone who has the self-confidence to make decisions and not always have to lean on her for planning certain things and figuring out all the logistics.
7. Masculine energy in touch and voice
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Women are often attracted to a man who can remain calm and intentional in his touch and in the way he speaks. Women tend to be drawn to masculine energy in touch and voice.
This behavior demonstrates that they are grounded, which makes a woman feel a sense of stability and emotional security. The distinctiveness between her feminine energy and her partner’s masculine energy can also create a dynamic that a woman finds attractive and endearing.
8. Confidence without arrogance
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Most women tend to find confidence to be an attractive, masculine trait, as long as it doesn't veer into arrogance. This shows that the individual has a good sense of self and defines their self-worth based on external validation.
Joann Cohen, a dating coach and professional matchmaker, explains that “True confidence is self-assurance. Confident men don’t feel a need to try too hard. They aren’t out to prove anything – to themselves or anyone else.”
Women appreciate a confident partner who will likely pursue them, be successful in various aspects of their life, and possess the strength and self-control necessary to develop a fulfilling relationship.
9. Strong, mysterious presence
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When someone can let their masculine presence be known in a strong and mysterious way, they exhibit qualities that women are often attracted to. They are never overdoing it, yet their personality still shines through.
These individuals seem grounded and confident without showing too much ego. Their lack of always trying to dominate conversation and prove themselves to a crowd leads them to having a more understated and mysterious presence that ends up being way more appealing than the presence of someone in need of social validation.
10. Empathy
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Empathy can lead to an individual being emotionally intelligent and understanding how to build a healthy relationship on a foundation of respect, compassion, and a secure connection. This leads to many women finding themselves drawn to masculine empathy.
When her partner can understand her need to feel safe and emotionally secure within the relationship, a woman will feel the connection deepen and will have a willingness to express herself to her partner often. An empathetic partner makes it easier for a woman to be true to herself and feel supported even in times of difficulty. Masculine empathy provides her with a solid rock to lean and rely on, which is likely something she craves in a partner.
11. Goal-driven
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Women feel drawn to goal-driven individuals. They understand that an ambitious partner is likely to be a solid provider, passionate, and remain a reliable and firm foundation within a relationship.
If an individual is committed to reaching their goals, they will likely also be committed to making the most out of the relationship. Women also prefer someone they feel like they can grow with. They want someone who seems just as passionate about things as they are.
Of course, not everyone has the same preferences or attractions when it comes to relationships. While many women likely do find these traits appealing and are drawn to the individuals who possess them, others may look for other traits in a potential partner.
Kamryn Idol is a writer with a bachelor's degree in media and journalism who covers lifestyle, relationship, family, and wellness topics.
