If A Woman No Longer Likes Her Husband As A Person, She'll Start Saying These 11 Things Casually
Sometimes, even when you still love someone, you don't actually like them as a person.
Andrey_Popov / Shutterstock People change. It’s not uncommon for a woman to marry someone only to struggle to stay interested in him. Maybe it’s because he has changed. With age, people can take on new personality traits. She could also have changed, making her husband’s personality and behavior less attractive to her. These changes can make or break a relationship. Sometimes, people change for the better, but occasionally, they change for the worse, and while she may still love him, if a woman no longer likes her husband as a person, she'll start saying things that reflect her true opinion.
It’s not always a personality change that sparks a woman to no longer like her husband as a person. Living with someone for a long time can reveal who they truly are. Suddenly, all of their bad habits have been revealed. You start to grow irritated with the little things, from how they fail to put their dirty dishes in the dishwasher to how they chew their food. As a result, you may grow to dislike them. When that happens, your words will tell him how you really feel, even if you don't.
If a woman no longer likes her husband as a person, she'll start saying these 11 things casually
1. ‘He’s getting on my nerves’
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I know I have been guilty of saying this phrase to my friends. Of course, I don’t dislike my partner as a person, but it’s not uncommon for them to get on my nerves. Living with someone can test your patience. However, when a wife is completely sick of who her husband is as a person, this phrase will be tossed around.
If you have a friend who constantly vents about her husband, she may be dealing with a true dislike for him. Everything he does bothers her. She can find a way to complain about anything. This can be hard for her to navigate. If she dislikes her husband but isn’t ready to put serious thought into leaving the relationship, she may casually bring up the irritation she feels.
2. ‘I’m tired of him’
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If someone’s wife is comfortable sharing that she is sick of her husband, it’s a clear sign that something isn’t right in their marriage. There are many reasons why she has grown tired of him. It could be as simple as his inability to help with the cleaning, or how little time he dedicates to her or their family. It’s exhausting to deal with someone when you feel like you have to constantly pick up their slack.
“No marriage stays on a high forever. But when the silence starts feeling heavier than words ever did, it’s usually not random,” Bexley Laylani wrote on Medium. “A wife who’s tired often shuts down. Not because she doesn’t feel — but because she’s been feeling too much for too long, and nothing has changed.”
3. ‘He works too much’
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Some men view their ability to support their family as the most masculine and important thing they can do. This intention starts pure, but it can eventually become an issue. We all know that one person is more invested in their work than anything else. Their personal lives will become less important as they focus more on climbing the corporate ladder.
When a wife notices her husband is devoting more time to his job than to their relationship, she will secretly begin to dislike him as a person. It’s frustrating to maintain a marriage with someone who would rather be in the office. His constant long hours at work can also bring her anxiety. Could he be having an affair with a colleague? A woman who notices her husband’s work hours continue to increase will become frustrated with who he is as a person.
4. ‘He’s boring’
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The honeymoon phase can’t last forever. It’s unrealistic to think that every day with your partner will be exciting. Things change as relationships grow. Life isn’t fun and glamorous all the time. However, when a wife comes to dislike her husband, she might find that he is boring because he doesn’t put effort into having fun with her.
Losing the fun in a relationship can put it in jeopardy. “Only in fairy tales do couples get married and live happily ever after. In real life, all marriages have their ups and downs, good times and bad,” David Ludden, Ph.D., wrote for Psychology Today. “But while many couples are generally satisfied with their relationships, others become greatly disappointed with theirs, whether they eventually break up with their partner or not.”
5. 'He can be mean'
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When a woman is subtly hinting that her husband is mean to her, she could be trying to explain why she no longer likes her husband as a person. When she is dealing with a tough time at home because of a mean husband, she will be nervous to share this with those closest to her. She may bring it up casually. Something like, ‘He is occasionally mean’ or ‘he can get grumpy about certain things.’
Unfortunately, a mean husband could be a casual way to say things may be getting out of hand at home. It’s hard to know the extent of the cruelty when she subtly shares her husband’s bad behavior. When someone begins to act meanly to their partner, it’s no surprise that their feelings towards them will change. A woman who no longer likes her husband as a person could be dealing with a truly unpleasant person.
6. ‘We're in a tough spot’
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We’ve all gone through difficulties in our lives. It’s not always easy, especially in a marriage. However, when a woman shares that she and her husband are in a tough spot, there could be more going on behind the scenes.
For example, they are currently dealing with financial issues. Her husband has become distrustful of their checkbook. He’s making poor spending decisions and has put their livelihood at risk. They’re barely able to put food on the table. She will grow to dislike him because she cannot trust him with their credit cards.
7. ‘We're arguing a lot’
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Arguing with your husband can be healthy. It’s unrealistic for a couple to always get along. It’s how you handle your disagreements that matters most. When a wife finds herself arguing with her husband often, she’ll casually bring it up to the people in her life. She will open up about how these fights are making her change her overall opinion about her husband as a person. This can become especially frustrating when they are repeating the same argument over and over again.
“Repeat arguments can become significant issues for couples. They can increase relationship stress and deplete a relationship's mutually shared satisfaction, trust, and safety, which partners need to remain committed and close to each other,” says Katherine Cullen, MFA, LCSW, for Psychology Today. “If an argument keeps cropping up, chances are you and your partner either haven’t found a solution to the problem at the argument’s root or you’ve come up with a solution but one or both of you is struggling to implement the changes that solution requires."
8. ‘I wish he’d go out more’
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Sometimes, a wife who has grown tired of who her husband is as a person wants a break from him. She’s unhappy when he’s at home. She’ll find it easier for herself to spend time alone. She likely has hobbies that allow her to destress that she can’t do when he’s at home.
An unhappy wife can grow annoyed by her husband always being at home. He is likely relying on her to do too much for him. She will find his inability to care for himself or get out with his own friends a reason to dislike him. If she casually says this, she could be hinting at long-term issues in her relationship.
9. ‘He needs a hobby’
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When a wife says this, she is likely hinting that she has grown frustrated with her partner's behavior. He’s likely spending too much time at home, and she is growing tired of it. Maybe he is relying on her for entertainment. She has grown so tired of him as a person that spending time with him has become too much for her. She may feel that she can’t truly be herself or dive into her passions because of her husband.
“Healthy relationships thrive on a balance of connection and autonomy. This means that while shared activities are essential, so is having personal interests and hobbies. We often hold the unrealistic expectation that our "soulmate" should meet all our needs all the time, but this isn't feasible and places undue pressure on one person,” writes Rebecca Williams, therapist with Inland Empire Couples Counseling. “Each partner should come to the relationship as a whole, complex individual. Embracing separate hobbies allows partners to maintain their individuality and bring more richness and fulfillment into the relationship. It is perfectly normal — and healthy — for partners to not share every interest or hobby.”
10. ‘He’s lazy’
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Resentment grows quickly when a wife feels she is doing all the work around the house. She will begin to dislike her husband as a person when she finds he has no desire to help her with chores. If he’d rather sit on the couch and watch sports instead of helping with cleaning or caring for the children, her opinion of him will change.
We’ve all heard about or experienced personally the disrespect of a husband who spends all of his time playing video games or doing other mindless tasks. It’s frustrating for the woman they share a home with. When this type of resentment grows, it’s not surprising that a pure dislike for him will eventually come out. She will casually bring up how lazy her husband is when she has grown to dislike him as a person.
11. ‘He’s full of himself’
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An enlarged ego can be a major turn-off for women. Men can be guilty of looking for a woman to boost their self-esteem. When he feels comfortable with her, he may begin to act like he is better than everyone else. A wife whose husband is full of himself can easily grow to dislike him as a person.
According to Primer Magazine, a man’s ego is his biggest enemy. “You’ve seen men with hugely inflated egos that seem to have 'made it.” The cocky playboy, the arrogant entrepreneur, the narcissistic fitness model. It seems great on the surface, but ultimately, your ego’s fears will keep you stuck,” the publication states. This behavior can be a major turn-off and make a wife no longer like her husband.
Haley Van Horn is a freelance writer with a master’s degree in Humanities, living in Los Angeles. Her focus includes entertainment and lifestyle stories.
