If A Couple Truly Loves Each Other From The Core Of Their Soul, They'll Do These 5 Things On A Regular Basis
Habits that reveal a love rooted at the core of their soul.
Vingeran | Canva You've got skills, we know. You're strong, competent, and communicative, to name a few. But "while these are all important foundational skills for living a successful and happy life, they need to be built on to help an individual transition to a successful and happy partnership," explains psychotherapist and marriage coach Toni Coleman.
Enter: Couple skills, next-level expertise we need for how to make a relationship work, especially when you're in a partnership with someone you love from the deepest part of your soul. Don't worry — they're not too hard to grasp. Here are some tips from our experts to give you a start.
If a couple truly loves each other from the core of their soul, they'll do these 5 things on a regular basis:
1. Have empathy
According to Lesli Doares, marriage coach and author of Blueprint For A Lasting Marriage, empathy is the ability to see things from your partner's perspective, and it's a huge plus in your relationship.
"No two people experience life in the same way, and this leads to viewing the same event differently," she explains. "Being empathetic and understanding and seeing these as legitimate differences, not in terms of one of you being right and the other wrong, is key for success."
2. Think in we, not me
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You know what you need and how to get it. "But when someone is part of a couple, he or she needs to view each need as it impacts 'us' as a couple, and not just him or her as an individual," says Coleman.
"Keeping a 'we' perspective will help a couple to make sure both of their needs are priorities for them as a couple, which helps create a balance and maintain a sense of oneness."
3. Regulate their emotions
That anger that bubbles up when you see your spouse has left the house in disarray? You've got to be able to put it in check, Doares says.
"Each of you is responsible for managing your own emotions and having a plan for what to do when things get hot to minimize damage to your relationship," she says. "If one of you can remain calm and implement that plan, then there will be no escalation and no need for repair."
4. Communicate well and often
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Good communication skills include active listening, not interrupting, asking good follow-up questions, reflection, and avoiding jumping to conclusions, among other traits.
"There are several skills for couples to learn to be good communicators, but these are not difficult and if used consistently, can make or break a relationship," she says.
5. Know how to strike a compromise
All communication skills are valuable in a relationship. "But the ability to negotiate a solution you both can support and implement is the key to being willing to tackle the hard stuff that inevitably crops up," says Doares.
Plus, she adds, negotiation keeps resentment at bay. "When you can successfully negotiate, there is no manipulation or giving in, and that keeps resentment from taking hold," she explains.
Jillian Kramer is an award-winning storyteller. She's been featured in Food and Wine, Glamour, SELF, Brides, and Women's Health Magazine.
