3 Behaviors People Find Really Gross But Rarely Call Out
Polina Zimmerman | Unsplash It's no surprise that most singles — 73 percent of women and 66 percent of men — have somewhere between two and five first-date pet peeves, at least according to a survey from the dating site Zoosk. Women may be a bit easier to annoy (or maybe men are just more annoying), as 18 percent admitted to having more than five peeves. Meanwhile, nearly a quarter of men have one or no pet peeves whatsoever.
While you may be thinking, "Who cares?" this is a big deal; most women — a whopping 70 percent — have said no to a second date based on their pet peeves. Half of the men have done the same. So, when it comes to making a lasting, annoyance-free first impression, here are some of the biggest first date pet peeves based on Zoosk's survey of more than 1,500 singles.
Here are the 3 behaviors people find really gross but rarely call out:
1. Someone who neglects basic self-care
Women are more sensitive to odor, with 45 percent of ladies saying a smelly date is their biggest pet peeve. Technology-obsessed dudes who can't keep their hands off their phones are the second biggest annoyance, with 22 percent of the votes. Another survey by Match, a dating site, found that 73% of women surveyed hated it when men were on their phones the entire time.
Timeliness is also key, as 13 percent of women can't stand when a date is late. The final two peeves on the list seem somewhat trivial: "When my date talks about himself too much" and "When my date peppers me with questions like a job interview." Each only garnered five percent of the votes.
2. Someone who won't put down their phone
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Men share similar dissent in describing their dating annoyances. For starters, they'd like women to stop tweeting, texting, and updating their Facebook status, with 51 percent of men ranking "Too occupied with a cell phone" as their biggest pet peeve.
Ladies, you'll also want to remember your deodorant and a fresh spritz of perfume occasionally, as 21 percent of guys find smelly dates annoying. Ten percent of males rank a late date as annoying, and seven percent hate being peppered with too many questions. Finally, ladies, go light on the eyeshadow for your next date; seven percent of men list "When my date is wearing too much makeup" as a big peeve.
3. Someone who's crude
Once you manage to smell your best and part ways with your cell phone, you'll want to make sure your chosen conversation topics are in line. Guys, this means steering clear of innuendo, as 53 percent of women can't stand it when a man brings unwanted topics into a discussion. Meanwhile (not surprisingly), only nine percent of men dislike it when a woman makes suggestive comments.
Women generally rate men who keep conversation clean as more attractive partners. A study in Personality and Individual Differences found that women consistently preferred "clean" humor over crude jokes, viewing men who went dirty as less desirable for both casual dates and serious relationships.
The good news is that making a great impression doesn't require a personality overhaul. A 2023 study found that the people rated most likable in initial encounters simply showed up with warmth.
They smiled, expressed genuine interest in others, and stayed present in the conversation. Skip the distractions, keep it classy, and focus on making the other person feel seen. That's really all it takes to stand out for the right reasons.
Kait Smith is an editor, writer, social media manager, and blogger who writes about the rules of love and relationships.
