If Any Man In Your Life Does These 9 Things, You’ve Found Someone Rare And Hard To Replace
jonathanborba | Pexels The rare, hard-to-replace man is the person who walks into your life and changes everything. It’s the person who walks into our life and we can’t understand how we lived our lives before them. They are a partner that challenges you, they drive you crazy, but they’re still always by your side.
Once you meet them, you can’t understand how you ever lived without them. How do you know that you have found “the one” in a world with 7 billion other people?
If any man in your life does these 9 things, you’ve found someone rare and hard to replace:
1. They make you smile
Many partners may give you excited jitters at the beginning of your relationship. But you know they’re “the one” when you’ve been together for a long time, and they still make you smile like it’s the first time you met.
Most people assume that the giddy, can't-stop-smiling phase of a relationship has an expiration date. But a 10-year study found that partners who maintained high positive emotions over the long haul reported better mental health, stronger moods, and higher life satisfaction than couples whose happiness faded over time.
2. They’re by your side no matter what
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Even if you’ve had a heated argument or they disagree with the choices you make, they don’t just walk away when the relationship gets hard. If your partner is truly “the one,” they stay by your side through thick and thin.
Researchers interviewed 180 couples who had been married for 40+ years about what actually kept them together through their hardest seasons. The top strategies were drawing closer during hardship, persevering together, and consistently prioritizing the relationship over the problem, basically choosing each other again and again even when it would've been easier not to.
3. They treat you as their equal
If your partner is “the one,” they understand that your life is just as important as theirs – and they never make you feel bad about it. They divide your work and theirs equally. If they are “the one,” they understand that you have a life of your own, and they give you time to enjoy it. They know that equal treatment is the most precious gift anyone can give.
4. They express their love through actions, not just words
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Your partner may say a lot, but “the one” backs up their words with actions. Even small gestures that show that your partner cares can show that they are “the one.”
Renowned American psychologist John Gottman's research found that relationships live and die by tiny everyday gestures he calls "bids for connection," things like reaching for your hand, asking about your day, or making you coffee without being asked. Couples who stayed together responded to those small bids 86% of the time, while couples who eventually divorced only turned toward each other 33% of the time.
5. They cheer up your gloomy days
Not every day is sunshine and roses, and anyone who can lift your mood on your hardest days is worth keeping forever. Not just anyone can make you smile when you’re feeling down, so if they can, they may just be “the one.”
When a partner provides real, consistent support during difficult moments, it directly boosts emotional resilience, strengthens the relationship bond, and creates a sense of security and mental peace that carries into every other area of life. Researchers have found that the person who can make a bad day feel survivable is building the emotional foundation that keeps the whole relationship standing.
6. You wonder how you survived without them
Lots of people make you feel like you can’t live without them. But when you wonder how you possibly lived before a special someone came into your life, they’re probably “the one.”
Psychologists who specialize in the science of love and relationships, Arthur and Elaine Aron, found that when we fall in love, we literally absorb parts of our partner into our own identity, including their perspectives, traits, and worldview.
7. They make you a better version of yourself
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You know that you’ve found “the one” when they help you become a kinder, calmer, more successful version of yourself. This doesn’t mean that they change who you are. It simply means that “the one” gives you a different perspective and helps you live a happier, more fulfilled life.
8. They help you fight any relationship insecurities you have
Insecurity is a poison that slowly kills many relationships. The right person, though, will never give you reason to question them or your relationship. And if your anxiety about the relationship makes you feel insecure, they’ll reassure any doubts you have about their love for you.
9. They accept you with all of your baggage
We all go through tough times in life and have personal baggage we’d rather not share. However, when someone is meant to be with you, no amount of past trauma will change their decision to stay.
The right person for you will accept you for everything you are, instead of always giving reasons that they should leave. Some people walk into your life and make you wonder how you ended up with someone so incredible.
They accept you, respect you, and always push you to improve yourself. When you love someone without reason or explanation, and they love you back just as fiercely, you know without a doubt that you have found “the one.”
Tanzeela Sareea is an entrepreneur and hobbyist writer whose work has been featured on Unwritten and Project Wednesday. They focus on topics of travel, relationships, and psychology.
