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‘I Let Him Cheat’ — Woman Reveals Why She Waited Until Husband Cheated 5 Times Before She Dumped Him

Photo: wrangler / Shutterstock 
Woman looking out the window

While many people consider cheating the ultimate dealbreaker, one woman allowed her husband to cheat on her five times before kicking him out for good.

She revealed the strategic reason she let her husband cheat on her five times before divorcing him.

The woman shared her story on the subreddit thread, r/TrueOffMyChest, an online space for people to share personal and intimate stories they do not wish to share with those close to them.

“I let him cheat while I built my home working place and kicked him out when it was ready,” she wrote.

The woman shared that she and her now ex-husband were together for 16 years, married for 14, and had an 11-year-old son and a four-year-old daughter. The woman revealed that the first time she caught her husband cheating on her, she blamed herself since she said she was “pushing him to get an actual job” since he was unemployed at the time. 

The woman says that since her husband was her first love, she forgave him after he cheated the first time and never mentioned it again. However, he would go on to cheat four more times after the initial incident. 

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The woman wrote that her husband was let go from the job he had during the pandemic, and she became the financial provider and caretaker of the family. 

“I worked from home whenever I could while taking care of kids, chores, and bills,” she wrote. 

She soon discovered that her husband was cheating again since he “followed a pattern” of behavior while he was being unfaithful. 

“One day I took his phone and found messages with another woman we will call A46,” the woman wrote.

She chose not to confront her husband and put all of her attention on her work and home instead.

“I did nothing, sent the chat to my phone and forgot about it for the moment, then started to invest in my work, and distanced myself from him, which wasn't so hard, I was working like crazy and caring for the kids while he was always on the phone with the mistress,” she wrote. 

The woman even lent money to her husband to go to football games with his friends and bought him clothes and shoes since she was earning more money from her growing at-home business. Soon, the woman’s husband began to complain about her spending.

“He complained I'm just spending on whims and that since that was the case, he wanted a tattoo,” she wrote.

The woman responded to her husband to get a job if he wanted some extra money to spend on a tattoo, which prompted her husband to come up with a plan.

“The mistress lives in another state so he came up with a construction job that was in that state precisely and would take 15 to 20 days,” she wrote.

By that time, all of her intended work plans were falling into place and she had finally reached a financially comfortable position.

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Once her home was ready, she made her move.

“I had my offices well installed and stocked, got myself a good number of clients, and started teaching via meet, so I felt ready,” the woman wrote. “I prepared a nice romantic meal, sent the kids to grandma and during dinner, I asked him for divorce.”

The woman revealed to readers why she waited so long to kick her husband out of the house and why she allowed him to get away with cheating for so long. 

“You might ask why I waited, he wasn't a terrible father and while spending a lot of time on his phone, also took care of the kids for me to work, it was bringing food to the table after all,” she shared. “I used him and I don't feel an ounce of guilt about it.” 

People praised the woman for her decision. 

“Oh wow, I'm so proud of you! It takes a special kind of person to keep a cool, calm, and collected persona, while in an emotionally distressing situation. You lined your pieces up perfectly, got the timing right, and executed the plan flawlessly,” one user commented.

“You’ve inspired me to handle a crisis like this in the future. You did amazing, congratulations on your freedom!” another user wrote.

“You’re a hero! Let his mistress support him now,” another shared.

In a follow-up post, the woman thanked Redditors for their support and encouraging words. She revealed that it has now been two years since divorcing her husband, and her business is doing well and that she’s been able to complete home renovations including a new bathroom and kitchen.

“The kids got new clothes, shoes, small luxuries we couldn't afford before. I for myself started doing salon, nails, skincare, and even some tattoos, all this might sound shallow but in years I never got that for it was taking money for food or bills, also this was used against me time and again,” the woman wrote. “So I decided to glow up, as a self-treat. I have a lot of projects, which I'm working on one at a time, and keep investing in my business without it hindering my economy. In a year and a half, I pulled my small family of 3 out of debt and into a better life. I'm happy.”

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Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.