If He's Doing These 12 Things, He's Not 100% Sure About You

Is he debating dating you?

man looking unsure while he talks to a woman over coffee fizkes / Shutterstock

Guys are strange creatures. Though most can tell right off the bat if they want to be with you, sometimes they need a little extra time.

The problem with guys is that it's often hard to tell whether he isn't sure about you, or if he's just using you as a "placeholder" or a fling.

If you notice the signs listed below, chances are that he's not totally sure on you or that he's using you.

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The big telltale difference between the two all lies in how much time has passed. So, if it's taking too long for him to decide, it may be time to decide for him.

12 signs he's not sure about you

1. He seems insecure about his ability to keep you satisfied.

This is a sign that he's doubting that you're able to stay loyal to him, or that he's worried you aren't sincere about your interest in him.

He might actually feel intimidated by you at this point and may feel more comfortable with someone who isn't as attractive or sexual.

2. You get the feeling you may have raised some yellow or red flags with him.

Has he seemed concerned about one or two things? If so, he might be having doubts based on a red flag you raised to him.


3. He's stalling on major commitment milestones.

Is he hemming and hawing about actually calling you his girlfriend? Are you still engaged after three years? Has he been avoiding the topic of meeting his parents?

If so, he might be mulling over whether or not he really wants to be with you.

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4. You have a nagging feeling that he's ogling other girls.

This could be a sign that he's just not sure whether you're the right one for him, or whether he's "settling."

If he doesn't see what you're worth, you need to move on. This guy will most likely be a cheater in the making.

5. He doesn't let you touch his phone.

This is often a sign that he might still have other girls he's talking to. It could also be a sign that he's talking to his guy friends about you, and that he might have misgivings about dating you.


If you get a bad feeling in your gut about his reactions, it may be time to cut ties with him.

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6. At times, he just seems distracted.

Usually, this sign comes in the form of lagging replies or just really distant behavior. If he seems distracted, it could be because he's just not sure whether the relationship is going in a direction that he wants.

7. His Facebook status still says "single."

He's not ruling out other options if he's doing this.

8. He flat-out told you that he's still deciding.

Obviously, this is the clearest indicator that he's either unsure or actually stringing you along. If he can't make up his mind within a reasonable amount of time, it's time to move on.


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9. He doesn't really tell you much about his life.

He won't tell you much about where he works, where he lives, or even what his friends do for fun if he's still feeling you out. The surer he becomes about you, the more likely it is that he'll start gabbing.

10. It often seems like a hot-and-cold game with him.

If a guy is acting like a moody teenager, he can't make up his mind about you. Honestly, though, if he's actually acting this mercurially, do you really want to deal with that?

Even if he does decide he wants you, a guy this moody should probably take a hike.

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11. Overall, his answers are pretty vague.

This is a sign that he's either unsure of you or that he's already made a decision to dump you.

Regardless of which option it is, it's probably best to try to get a solid answer out of him when it comes to where you stand. At the very least, you'll be able to figure out what to do from there, rather than try to play mind reader.

12. You don't feel like his top priority.

A guy who isn't sure about a girl or doesn't want a relationship with her will not make her his top priority. It's just that simple.

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Ossiana Tepfenhart is a writer who mainly focuses on lifestyle, food, finance, and relationships.