Heartbreak

Does Your Ex Still Think About You? How To Instantly Find Out

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woman sitting alone by lake on a cloudy day

After a breakup, it seems like you and your ex have already gone your separate ways.

Or, maybe your ex never even knew you to begin with.

So, you can't help but wonder if, on the other side of this icy wall of silence, your ex ever even thinks about you at all?

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Does your ex miss you the way you miss them?

Cutting straight to the chase, yes, your ex most likely still thinks about you.

If you’ve shared a part of your life with someone, they aren’t going to completely forget that you ever existed. They will think back to your time together and may even remember all the positive experiences that the two of you have had.

Yes, there may be pain and hurt associated with all of that, but they certainly do still think of you. But do they still care or even love you?

I know that you’re probably not just wondering if your ex happens to have thoughts about you — you want to know if they still feel something for you.

Do they miss you the way that you miss them?

The truth is that, yes, if they are being honest, they probably do still feel some emotions toward you. They may even regret that the breakup happened.

And they may still feel a lot of hurt and heartbreak.

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Your ex is protected by emotional armor

They probably also know, if they are being honest with themselves, that there were positive moments that the two of you shared together — and they probably miss those times.

In fact, they are hiding the pain behind emotional armor.

Granted, they may not let their mind veer in those directions. They may be so addicted to the story that they tell themselves about the hurt that they experienced that they just don’t let themselves acknowledge that pain.

But, you can rest assured that your ex does have feelings for you.

They may just be hidden behind pain, hurt, frustration, anger, or any other emotions that may still be lingering from the breakup.

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How to get through their emotional armor

If you want to know how to get your ex back and connect again so you can explore what might be possible for the two of you, you are going to need to meet them where they are, emotionally.

Yes, the two of you have your history. And yes, there may be hurt and pain that is still lingering there.

But, just because there was love once doesn't mean they want to get back together. You also have to see things from their point of view and be willing to relate to them with understanding and compassion.

Once they are able to see that you are willing to meet them where they are, emotionally, they’ll be much more likely to release the pain and hurt that they are holding on to.

And once they are able to do this, they’ll be receptive to talking to you again.

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It starts by connecting on an emotional level

You need to get past the complex feelings that both of you are probably experiencing. And, of course, they may not be in a place in their life where they are able or willing to explore what might be possible between the two of you.

But you’ll never know for certain unless you’re willing to set aside pride and be emotionally honest and vulnerable.

Here's an important piece of dating advice you need to heed if you want your ex back: When you break up with someone, it doesn't always mean you're done for good.

Instead, take a chance and open yourself up to resolving the pain from the past. You just never know what you might experience as a result.

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Clay Andrews is a relationship coach and founder of Attract the One. He specializes in helping people repair, save and build relationships.