Woman Shames Parents Who Surrender Their Pets Once They Have Children — While Others Encourage Her To Show Empathy

"They were your babies first."

woman, cat, dog Ekaterina43 / Shutterstock

Most people who have ever owned a pet can agree that they are our fur babies no matter how old they get and how much our lives change.

Unfortunately for some of us, that means letting them go — whether that be euthanizing them when they become too old or ill, re-homing them with another family, or surrendering them to an animal shelter when we can no longer adequately care for them.

One woman called out people who surrender their pets once they learn that they are pregnant or have children.

The TikTok video that has been viewed over 100,000 times by user @thefemmewife bashing those who surrender their pets has caused a stir online.


“POV: I told you you’re a POS [Piece of Expletive] for rehoming your animal(s) just because you got pregnant,” she wrote in the text overlay in the video. 

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She argued that your pets are always and forever your first baby and are still your babies even when you have children.

“They aren’t your training for the ‘real thing,’” the woman wrote in her video’s caption, referring to people who adopt pets to prepare themselves for parenthood.

“That was your baby first.”

Some people agreed with the woman, expressing their horror when people dump their pets once they have families.

“We have 16 chickens, 3 cats, and a dog. Wouldn’t give any of them up ever, and I’m currently pregnant,” one TikTok user shared.

toddler hugging a white cat halfpoint / Canva Pro


“I got my cats with the knowledge that they will be here when I have my children. When I move, when I travel, when I marry… how do ppl not think of that?” another user noted.

“We’ve got 3 dogs; they were my babies first and will continue to be so,” another user shared.

However, others encouraged the woman to judge less and empathize more with people who have had to give up their pets after starting a family.

While it may appear as if they got bored or sick of their pets after their children arrived, this is not always the case.

“I rehomed my dog because the shift in my hormones made him scared of me, and the stress of a child in the home was literally killing him. He's thriving in his new home now. I will never feel guilty for it,” one TikTok user revealed.


"I feel so bad that I had to surrender both my cats when I got pregnant, but it was only cause I became homeless and wanted better for them,” another user shared.

“I rehomed my cat because I couldn’t take care of his litter box while pregnant, and it wasn’t anyone else’s responsibility. Sorry, not sorry, but he loves his new home, and I visit him frequently,” another user wrote.

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Unforeseen circumstances can arise when you become a parent that might change the dynamic between you and your pet.

You may not have the same freedom as you used to. Your children may have allergies that are aggravated by your pets. Your pets may be unable to tolerate your young children, potentially putting them both at risk. You may not have the finances to care for both your pets and your children.


Your perspective on being a pet parent may change after having children. 

You may no longer have the means to care for them like you used to, and you have no choice but to surrender or re-home them. 

woman, dog Sergey Novikov / Shutterstock

It's important to think of the future before bringing a pet into your home.

Will our lifestyles be able to accommodate them for as long as they live? If not, do we have a backup plan and a good home lined up for them?


When we see a cute and helpless animal in the pet store or behind the bars of a shelter cage, our hearts swell, and many of us have the maternal desire to bring them home with us. However, adopting a pet is never something that we should take lightly, and we have to ask ourselves if we have what it takes to be their everything.

According to ASPCA, approximately 6.3 million pets enter animal shelters in the U.S. each year. Unfortunately, 920,000 of these animals will never go to their forever homes and are euthanized when shelters become too overcrowded.

Their last moments will be spent lonely, sad, and confused, wondering where their families went and why they never came back for them.


It is okay to admit that you can no longer properly care for your pets after you have children. However, they were once your most precious babies who do not deserve to be tossed into animal shelters.

At least find them the best home possible where you know they will receive all of the love they could no longer receive from you.

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Megan Quinn is a writer at YourTango who covers entertainment and news, self, love, and relationships.