10 Things People Raised By Good Parents Do That Everyone Else Thinks Is Weird
Your upbringing has the power to shape your adult life.
PeopleImages.com - Yuri A / Shutterstock From relationships to personal habits to professional success and even mental health, our childhood experiences play a powerful role in shaping our adult lives. Great parents equip their children with tools for success by modeling healthy behaviors at home.
Many of the things people raised by good parents do that everyone else thinks is weird are rooted in the safe, emotionally vulnerable, and supportive household they grew up within. For others who felt pressured to fight for attention and seek out validation growing up, these behaviors feel strange or uncomfortable, when in reality, they’re actually the true key to success, healthy relationships, and true inner confidence.
Here are 10 things people raised by good parents do that everyone else thinks is weird
1. They set boundaries openly
PeopleImages.com - Yuri A | Shutterstock.com
According to the Child Mind Institute, teaching kids how to set and respect boundaries from a young age starts with empathy. They have to understand how to respect what other people need, while also prioritizing their own wants and needs at the same time.
Whether it’s respecting privacy at home or having open conversations, setting boundaries is one of the things people raised by good parents do that everyone else thinks is weird and slightly uncomfortable, especially people who were forced to fight and argue for their basic needs and desires.
2. They express emotions as they come up
GaudiLab | Shutterstock.com
According to a 1995 study on emotional intelligence in parenting, teaching kids how to regulate their emotions and cope with their inner complexities is key to setting them up for later success, oftentimes more than urging them toward a higher IQ or tangible level of intelligence. They’re not only set up to foster healthier connections rooted in communication and trust, they’re better equipped to support their own internal well-being and self-esteem.
Empathy, self-esteem, and emotional intelligence are all inherently intertwined, according to a study from the Frontiers in Psychology journal, which is why great parents make an effort to introduce them all into their parenting styles and behaviors with children at home.
At the end of the day, empathetic people with self-esteem have a greater level of emotional clarity and security than those who don’t, setting them up for success in every aspect of their lives, even in uncomfortable and chaotic situations.
3. They offer support, rather than advice
Mariana_erato | Shutterstock.com
When someone wants advice and guidance, they’ll ask for it. If they’re venting and unloading emotions, and they don’t, chances are they’re just looking for support and affirmation. Great parents never give their kids unsolicited advice unless it’s absolutely necessary, which is why their kids grow up equipped to navigate conflict, resolve arguments, and build healthy relationships rooted in mutual understanding and vulnerability.
Like family therapist Sarah Epstein argues, unsolicited advice, especially between parents and their kids, is one of the most common reasons for resentment in family relationships. When you provide advice to someone who’s looking for support, it dismisses their emotions and feels like a solution to something they’re trying to work through intentionally.
4. They expect mutual effort
PeopleImages.com - Yuri A | Shutterstock.com
According to neuropsychologist Gretchen Hunter, children learn how to act and behave in relationships from their parents early in life. If their parents expect mutual effort, respect their partners in challenging times, and prioritize affection, their kids will grow to expect that in their own relationships.
In a platonic friendship or an intimate relationship, people raised by great parents expect mutual effort from everyone involved. They know that a relationship will never be 50/50 all the time, but they do ensure that any connection they’re investing time into adds value to their lives.
While it may seem strange or weird to a person who watched one of their parents carry a relationship on their back or put in far more effort at home, it’s a foundation of healthy relationships that great parents teach early on.
5. They’re calm during conflict
Chay_Tee | Shutterstock.com
According to experts from S.J. Quinney College of Law, there’s power in being able to stay calm amid conflict by regulating your emotions and actively listening to the people around you. Of course, if you’ve ever been in a heated argument or a stressful meeting at work, you know that it's a superpower that’s easier said than done.
However, kids who grow up in households with emotionally mature and intelligent parents learn to regulate themselves in the face of struggle. They know that the key to truly resolving conflict is actively listening, making other people feel heard, and being intentional with how they decide to express their emotions.
6. They call out poor behavior
Branislav Nenin | Shutterstock.com
Whether it’s stepping away from a conversation with gossipy people or setting a boundary in the middle of social interaction, being direct in calling out misbehavior is one of the things people raised by good parents do that everyone else thinks is weird. They were taught to know their worth and to stand up for themselves in situations where they were being disrespected, even if it meant making a conversation a little bit awkward or uncomfortable for a perpetrator.
Of course, they have the social and self-awareness to understand when setting a boundary or calling someone out is appropriate and when it’s not, but for the most part, they’re more concerned about protecting their peace than people-pleasing.
7. They enjoy being alone
PeopleImages.com - Yuri A | Shutterstock.com
Enjoying alone time is one of the things people raised by good parents do that everyone else thinks is weird. People who deal with self-esteem or anxiety may even actively turn away from alone time, struggling to understand why people would actively isolate themselves to spend more time with their thoughts.
Of course, according to a study from the University of Reading, people who enjoy solitude and prioritize their alone time generally live happier, healthier, and more fulfilling lives than those who actively avoid it.
So, parents who encourage their kids to invest in personal hobbies and build a strong relationship with themselves aren’t just giving them a way to fill their free time, but also setting them up for a more secure and stable reality in adulthood.
8. They talk to their parents like friends
Ground Picture | Shutterstock.com
According to child psychiatry expert Candida Fink, many of the healthiest parent-child relationships include an element of companionship that allows for healthy communication, affection, and trust. It’s not about crafting a hierarchy of power and structure at home, but rather making children feel heard and respected by encouraging them to play a role in their family relationships.
Of course, in adulthood, many of these children feel empowered to talk to their parents like they’re friends, because they have a foundation of mutual respect, understanding, and trust to lean on. It’s one of the things people raised by good parents do that everyone else thinks is weird, but it doesn’t necessarily mean that it's inappropriate or unhealthy.
9. They don’t chase love
Jose Calsina | Shutterstock.com
By teaching their kids the importance of building a strong relationship with themselves and equipping them with the skills to enjoy their own solitude, children raised by great parents grow up without the need to seek external validation and attention. They have the tools to craft healthy and fulfilling relationships, but they don’t feel the need to settle or chase after people who don’t add value to their lives.
Like experts from the National Institute of Health suggest, it all starts with meeting kids' needs. If children grow up with unmet needs, they’re already set back and at a disadvantage for developing the trust, emotional intelligence, and self-esteem it takes to enter the world of adult relationships with confidence.
10. They embrace casual vulnerability
Stock Rocket | Shutterstock.com
Embracing casual vulnerability is one of the things people raised by good parents do that everyone else thinks is weird. While others, who were taught to people-please and suppress emotions at home, save vulnerability for big moments and arguments, these kinds of adult children intentionally integrate it into every part of their lives.
Even in moments where it feels uncomfortable or strange, people raised by good parents embrace vulnerability to express their emotions, support others, and resolve conflict. Even if it means taking accountability in the workplace or expressing an uncomfortable feeling with a partner that others would prefer to suppress, they prefer to be open and honest.
Zayda Slabbekoorn is a staff writer with a bachelor’s degree in social relations & policy and gender studies who focuses on psychology, relationships, self-help, and human interest stories.
