Mom Of 4 Says She’s Not Married To The Father Of Her Kids Because She Still Wants Food Stamps

Marriage can potentially have some financial drawbacks.

mom playing on the floor with two sons Tomsickova Tatyana / Shutterstock

These days, everyone is just doing what it takes to get by. Prices are high, and most wages are low. People are going to great lengths out of necessity, which for one mom, includes not marrying the father of her four kids.

A mom of four explained that she's not married to her kids' father because she wants to qualify for food stamps.

A woman named Serenity, known as @raising4kiddos on TikTok, wanted to be a part of a TikTok trend prompting people to reveal the reasons they weren't yet married to their partner. While her reason for being unmarried is logical in this economy, unfortunately for her, many people didn't approach her answer with kindness.


“Why aren’t y’all married already?” one picture in the TikTok slideshow read.

“I still want food stamps,” Serenity responded.

mom with 4 kids on food stamps shurkin_son / Shutterstock

People were quick to pounce on the video with hate for Serenity. 

“Must be nice,” one person said.


“Until they find out you live together and make you pay it all back,” another said.

“They will find you and collect,” a third person insisted.

RELATED: Mom & Dad Who Don't Qualify For Food Stamps Go Hungry While Apologizing To Their Son For Not Being Able To Feed Him Enough

Serenity addressed the hate in a separate video. 

Serenity posted a follow-up video that's since been deleted to discuss the hate that she received for being honest about her situation.

I’m a mom of four,” she explained. “One’s my niece and three of them are my own. And it’s crazy to get upset over a joke, for when it’s a TikTok trend, and I just thought it was a really funny one.”


Serenity went on to detail why people should stop antagonizing her. 

“Nobody knows literally anything about my situation,” she said. “And so, for everybody to just assume that I’m doing something illegal is very funny.”

She also explained her situation in caring for her niece. 

niece of mom of 4 kids on food stamps shurkin_son / Shutterstock


“I take care of my niece literally full-time. Her mom’s never helped. So I’m going to take it where I can,” she stated. “And I’m going to use my little bit of Medicaid,” she concluded. “Because she needs eye surgery soon.”

Serenity received much more support after posting this video.

“As a fellow middle class momma, do you,” one woman said. “We deserve to take advantage of these opportunities since our insane amount of taxes are used to fund them.”

“Don’t listen to the negative comments,” someone else said. “They have zero clue what the system is about or how it functions. Keep doing you ma!”

RELATED: Man Who Grew Up Getting Help From A Food Bank Shares Why It’s Important For Moms On Food Stamps To Get Their Nails Done


It’s true that marital status can affect food stamp eligibility.

According to Rocket Lawyer, marriage can affect one’s eligibility for food stamps

“If you get married and your spouse has a higher income, you may be found ineligible for a program for which you were previously eligible,” the site explained.

Additionally, Rocket Lawyer pointed out, “Note that for some programs, marital status matters less than the number of people in the household, and ‘household’ is defined differently across various programs.”

This means that, in these situations, it’s better to not live in the same residence as your partner because your incomes could be counted together whether or not you are married.


Regardless of the exact law surrounding food stamp assistance, it’s important to remember that this woman is a person deserving of compassion and respect. She did not choose her situation, and she’s right to remind us that we know nothing about it in the first place. 

The hate this woman received just for sharing the reality she lives with was completely uncalled for. No one deserves that.

Instead, we should be recognizing the care this woman is putting into her role as a mother. She is doing all she can to make the best life for her children.


RELATED: Mom Says She Teaches Her Kids 'Responsibility' By Charging Them For 'Mock Bills' Each Month

Mary-Faith Martinez is a writer for YourTango who covers entertainment, news and human interest topics.