Kids Who Grow Up With Emotionally Regulated Parents Carry 6 Habits Into Adulthood
BaLL LunLa | Shutterstock Being emotionally regulated is all about balance, and parents who practice that kind of stability teach their kids self-control through habits they will carry with them their whole lives.
When parents understand their emotions and how to cope without turning volatile, their kids start to model that behavior. Not only that, but it builds an emotional bond between parents and children because they understand that feelings aren't something to ever be ashamed of.
6 habits kids with emotionally regulated parents carry with them as they become adults:
1. They don't fear constructive criticism
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When you grow up learning to see criticism as an opportunity to improve, you're better equipped to handle what life throws at you. Emotionally regulated parents can offer criticism when it's necessary without making their children feel like they've failed. They help equip their kids with the tools to recognize where they can improve.
As you get older, you start to apply those lessons to other areas of your life. When you receive feedback, whether it's about your work or something more personal, you're better able to separate your emotions from the advice itself and consider whether there's something you can learn from it. And most of the time, there is!
2. They know when to apologize
One of the easiest ways to recognize someone who grew up with emotionally stable parents is by paying attention to how they apologize. Kids who grew up with emotionally stable parents learned how to acknowledge their mistakes without making excuses for them.
As adults, they're better able to recognize what they did wrong and take responsibility for their actions. Being able to admit when you're wrong is an important part of maintaining healthy relationships, and it's a skill that often starts developing in childhood.
3. They don't feel the need to always be right
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Growing up in an emotionally regulated household can teach kids that winning an argument doesn't necessarily mean they'll feel better afterward. Being right doesn't always help you form strong connections with other people. I mean, no one likes a know-it-all.
If your parents never taught you how to recognize when you were taking an argument too far, how would you have learned to let things go? Emotionally regulated parents can model how to disagree in a healthy way. As adults, their children may be more willing to listen and to embrace compromise.
4. They know how to be happy for others
When parents struggle to regulate their emotions, their children may be more inclined to feel jealous and insecure. Regulated parents teach their kids to celebrate other people's wins.
Learning to be happy for others is something many people begin working on at a young age. Parents who celebrate other people's successes and encourage their children to do the same can help them carry that mindset into adulthood. It's a happier way to live.
5. They can move forward without closure
Moving on without closure means learning to let go of something or someone you once felt deeply connected to, even without understanding why. It's a difficult thing to learn, and not everyone figures out how to do it.
If you grew up with emotionally regulated parents, you may have learned how to exercise self-restraint when you're struggling to let something go. You can stop yourself from reaching out to someone when you know it will only make it harder to move forward.
6. They have an optimistic view of life
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Viewing life with a glass-half-full mentality is certainly better than seeing it as half empty all the time. Adults who look for the silver lining or find something good in an otherwise difficult situation may have learned that outlook from parents who did the same.
When parents can handle hard times and still smile, they show their children that a bad experience doesn't have to make everything else in life feel bad, too.
Being an optimist doesn't mean pretending life is great when you're struggling. It's more about acknowledging that bad things happen and it's okay to feel sad or hurt as long as you understand that those feelings don't last forever. Optimists can put setbacks into perspective, and they likely learned it from their parents.
Julia McNulty is a writer with a Master’s degree in Literary & Cultural Studies who specializes in lifestyle, relationship, culture, and human interest topics.
