3 Tips For Living Together Happily Over Age 50

Increasingly, couples over 50 are shacking up without getting hitched. Here's how to do it right!

By Susie & Otto Collins — Written on Aug 17, 2012

3 Tips For Living Together Happily Over Age 50 [EXPERT]

After divorcing in her late 40s, Carol thought she'd had her last chance at love and that she would have to just settle into being single for the rest of her life. Her children bring such joy to her life and she was very busy at work, volunteering in her community and with friends. However, Carol was very surprised when she met and fell head over heels in love with Brian five years later.

They took things slowly. But, now both of them want to take their relationship to the next level. Neither wants to get married, but they have decided to move in together so that they can wake up in one each other's arms every morning. There's no doubt in Carol's mind that this is the right thing to do. But, she's worried about how her children will react. She's also concerned that her friends won't approve. 5 Painfully Honest Reasons To End Your Relationship

Getting a second chance at love at midlife is a wonderful thing. It used to be that if you didn't have a partner by the time you hit your 40s, you'd just have to deal with being on your own. This is not necessarily a bad thing, unless you really want to be in a loving relationship.

Things are very different now. It is not unusual for a person to get divorced or go through a breakup and, in their middle to later years of life, meet and create a fabulous relationship with a new person.

A recent study indicates a growing trend for couples over the age of 50. These couples are choosing not to get married. Cohabitation is the preferred choice for many in this age group and it mirrors what younger couples are choosing as well. This decision to move in together and not get married can be for various reasons, including the following:

You've been through the cost and hassles of divorce and don't want to go through it again.
You like the feeling of freedom and autonomy, but also want regular companionship, affection and passion.
You've already experienced being married and simply don't feel the need to do it again.

Shacking up together can be a great way to commit to one another, while sidestepping some of the negatives that potentially come with getting married. If you are over 50 and are thinking about moving in with your partner, keep in mind that this change in how you live and love together also has possible pitfalls. Here are four do's and don'ts to consider when thinking about moving in with your partner.

1. Don't let your "shoulds" interfere. This stereotype might not be true for you, but it is for many people: As you get older, you accumulate a lot of beliefs about the way things should be. You've had experiences and you may have formed strong opinions of what is right and wrong, what is proper and what is not. Among those long-held beliefs could be that it is wrong for a couple to live together without being married.