How To Find True Love By Feeling Good

How To Find True Love By Feeling Good
Love, Self

You don't have to wait for true love to find you. You can live it everyday.

When I was single I spent much of my time waiting for that elusive knight in shining armor to swoop in and rescue me from my life. I had no idea how to attract that person and hoped that he would somehow fall into my lap. It wasn’t until I stopped waiting and worked on making myself happy that I was able to figure out how to find true love.

Finding true love is not usually something that simply happens to you one day. Neither is it something that is out of your control. On the contrary, finding true love is something you can work on strategically.

To get support in this, download my free guide to creating your Personal Happiness List.


The Law of Attraction and the quantum physics that support it, tell us that at the most basic level, our bodies are made up of energy. We each vibrate at certain, controllable, frequencies. And at whatever frequency we vibrate, we attract those people who vibrate at the same frequency. Author Deepak Chopra, in an article in the Huffington Post, talks about this principle and explains “Like attracts like, and the more you live your own ideal of love, the more your light will draw another light to you.“ So only if you emit positive energy, can you attract a positive, fulfilled partner.


Our emotions indicate to us our vibrational pitch. When we feel happy, successful and loved we emit a very different energy frequency than when we feel sad, frustrated or angry. This difference is apparent to others. It creates a state in which we either invite or block positive people from coming into our lives. Blockages can truly be the result of momentary stresses. However, if you find your conversations are more about the problems with men than your gratitude at having a loving and helpful partner, your vibrations may not be what you think.

Generally, few of us ask ourselves very often whether we feel good. To change this, consciously take a few moments throughout the day to check in with yourself. Ask: “How am I feeling at this very moment?” It’s easy to remember the crisis and conflicts that come during a day. Yet, the reality is that for most of us, much more of our day is filled with pleasant moments than unpleasant ones.

Why not give ourselves the chance to note those and revel in the good feeling that comes with some intentional appreciation. If remembering to do this proves difficult for you, set the alarm on your phone to remind yourself during the day. It only takes a moment. Events will come and demand our attention while feeling good sometimes requires us to have intention. Your vibrational frequency will reflect this and you will attract others who are feeling good as well.


To shift your vibration, first, start by taking stock of the people that surround you now. Several prominent inspirational speakers, including Tim Robbins, have used the statement that we are the average of the five people we spend most of our time with. I tend to agree. For years people who were unhappy with their lives surrounded me.

Once I became aware of how I felt around them, I started to look for people with more enthusiasm for their lives. And as a result, I rarely find myself entrenched in depressing conversations, but rather feel uplifted by the people who surround me.

So ask yourself who those five people are and examine how you feel when you are with them. Do they support you? Do they inspire you to stretch, learn and laugh? Or do they deplete your energy each time you see them?

If you have friends that leave you depleted, start to limit the time you spend with them. You can do this in subtle ways. You can simply not be as available. And if you do connect with them, make sure that you plan for short encounters. You don’t have to cut them out completely, but you can schedule one-hour coffee meetings versus planning to spend an entire day together.

If close family members leave you depleted, become proactive about changing the conversations you are having. Share good details of your life and steer away from topics that don’t make you feel good.


Plan more activities with the friends that do uplift you. You don’t have to wait for them to reach out to you. You can be proactive about reaching out to them and schedule activities together.

If, when you take stock of your close circle, you notice that you don’t have many people who uplift you, then start looking for new ones. Pick one or two topics that fulfill you, and search MeetUp.com for gatherings of like-minded people. Or search out resources your town or city may offer that could connect you with new people.


Attracting the sort of mate who wants to join you in an energizing and fulfilling relationship requires that you create your own fulfillment and the vibrational energy that goes with it first. So get comfortable with asking yourself, “am I happy at this instant?” and make it a routine practice to remind yourself that your life is pretty good. Re-connect with the activities that make you feel good.

One that always makes me feel good is hiking. I may be grumpy when I start, especially if I am holding on to something from my day that went wrong. However, by the time I get into nature and feel surrounded by all its beauty, everything else falls away and I feel wonderful.

I also started going to yoga classes because I loved how it made me feel. And once I started dating again, I connected with a man whose profile said he loved yoga. This man is my husband today. We had both figured out how to find true love because we were each taking care of our own needs first and pursued the things we love. And vibrating from that positive place we were able to attract each other.


I keep a happiness list on my phone. It lists activities that make me feel good. When I start feeling in a funk I scan the list and pick one of the activities. I then engage in it until I feel better. That way, I can ensure that I can lift myself out of a funk fairly easily without relying on anyone else’s help. To download a free guide on how to create your own happiness list, click here.

Figuring out how to find true love doesn’t require sweat and tears, but rather it requires you to take care of your own happiness. When you fill your day with activities you love and people that uplift you, you emanate joy and fulfillment. The right partner will feel attracted to you and will want to join you in this wonderful life you’ve created for yourself.

Selina Schuh is an educator, author, speaker, and owner of Empowered Living Strategies. She teaches women who are feeling frustrated and under-appreciated in their relationships step-by-step skills to create deeply connected relationships. Click here to visit her library of free resources.

This article was originally published at Empowered Living Strategies. Reprinted with permission from the author.