5 Ways To Get Better At Trusting Yourself (Which Is Key To Getting What You Need!)

Confidence doesn't come naturally for everyone, but you can learn it!

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This morning I was reflecting on a decision I needed to make. As I did so, I stopped myself from my default mode of self-doubt and considered what I truly wanted, and what I needed right now. 

And I made a choice for myself that gave me peace.

How do you make decisions? Do you trust yourself?

Sometimes, trusting yourself can be difficult, especially when you're not used to doing so. Do you find yourself asking others for their opinions or deferring to them? Have you learned to turn off your internal guide, perhaps after years of criticism? Have you done what others have told you to do to feel safe?

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Even though you've grown into a capable adult and surrounded yourself with people who love and accept you, childhood patterns can repeat themselves across the lifetime. 

What you may not realize is that giving your power away can cause anxiety and depression — even physical illness.

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So, how can you tap into yourself and learn how to trust yourself  — the only one who truly knows you and what you need?

You need to build the muscle. And here are 5 ways to connect to your heart magnet and cultivate self-trust:

1. Take some time to reflect on yourself with compassion. 

Ask yourself:

  • In what situations have I looked to others for answers?
  • What beliefs do I hold about trusting myself?
  • In what ways have I pushed aside my heart's desires because of fear?
  • Who were my role models for trusting one's self?
  • When have I relied on my own guidance? What happened?

Awareness is the starting point to shift your behavior.

2. Practice making decisions on your own and face your fears head-on.

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Narrow your authority. Pretend you are alone on a deserted island and avoid contact with others while you make up your mind. 

Don't fear that you will make a mistake. Remind yourself that progress is not perfection and that fear only exists in your mind. Write out and speak aloud some affirmations:

  • "No one knows me better than me."
  • "I make clear decisions for myself."
  • "I have the answers."
  • "My own counsel is wise."

3. Put aside time every day to ask yourself for guidance.  

Ignite your creative ability to solve your own problems. You can do this through a guided meditation practice or just taking a few quiet minutes to ask the universe a question and listen to the response it provides. 

Feel the answer in your body, in your gut, and in your breath.

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RELATED: How To Know If You're Coming Off As A Confident Woman


4. Find your bearings with someone outside the situation, like a counselor, coach, or mentor. 

People close to you speak from their heart magnet and they may have their own fear-based beliefs. Someone neutral can help you uncover your needs and desires and open up possibilities.

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Ultimately, you will be the expert on you.

5. Observe yourself.  

Notice when you trust yourself. Then, reward yourself. In doing so, you will rebuild your cognitive pathways, and you will be more likely to repeat the behavior — neuroscience says so!  

It doesn't hurt to surround yourself with people who are positive, too, and who reinforce your intentions.

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Opinions need defending. When you connect to your inner guidance, you engage your heart, higher thinking center, and whole being; it just feels right.

The best gift you can give yourself is a sense of peace amidst the uncertainties in life. Trust yourself and your decision-making ability, and you'll get what you need — and more!


RELATED: How To Fake Confidence When You Don’t Think You’re All That Great


Lisa Petsinis is a career and life coach. Contact her for a complimentary call and jumpstart the changes you want in your life today.