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Your happiness begins and ends with you.
By Lianne Avila — Written on Dec 04, 2019
The key to knowing how to be happier is self-care — but taking care of yourself is easier said than done.
However, in order to be a truly happy person, you need to believe that you deserve to be happy.
The key to finding happiness — as cliché as it sounds — can't be found in other people.
Happiness begins and ends with you.
So take some time to go out and create your own bliss. Happiness is right around the corner!
With that said, here are 10 self-care tips that will help you on your journey to be happier while also taking care of yourself.
1. Choose yourself
Sometimes this may upset others, but it has to be done. This may mean setting better boundaries with friends — or even your boss. This may help you sleep better and feel better about yourself.
It's easy to put ourselves last. Many things get in the way, like work or family. But, happy people realize that they need to put themselves, so you should do exactly that.
It really is true: We can't take care of anyone else unless we take care of ourselves.
2. Allow yourself to make mistakes
Give yourself permission to slip up every once in a while. No one is perfect — we are human and we all make mistakes. This is giving yourself a pass, just like you would to a friend or family member.
It's easy to give others a second chance but hard to do it for ourselves. So, stop putting the expectation of being perfect on yourself.
3. Allow yourself to dream big
Remember when you were a child and you had so many dreams? What happened to them?
Don't focus on whether or not they come true, just allow them to happen. This will do wonders for your emotional state and you will be happier for it.
4. End all toxic relationships
Don't stay with anyone that makes you feel bad or hurts you. This can actually be harmful to your health.
Recognize when you're in a toxic relationship and give yourself permission to walk away from it. There are a lot of really good people out there that can't wait to meet you, so go and find them!
You deserve it.
5. Stop beating yourself up with negative self-talk
This is something we have all done and it really is a waste of time. We tell ourselves things that aren't true. Maybe these are things you heard growing up or that were shouted at you in a prior relationship.
Replace each negative thought with a positive thought. It can be as simple as, "Today will be a fresh start."
6. Take time out to calm your mind every day
This is another one of those simple things that many people think they don't have time for.
Five minutes of deep breathing or meditation can do wonders for the brain and the body. You are totally worth at least five minutes!
7. Let go of the past
Stop blaming your parents or previous partners for current issues. They aren't perfect either, so this is a great time to start practicing gratitude.
What do you appreciate about yourself and the people who've influenced you? Write a list and keep it close by. This will help when you are feeling down.
8. Be realistic
Nobody is happy all the time and a real friend doesn't expect you to be that way.
You feel both good and bad emotions, and that's all right. Allow yourself to be human.
9. Have fun
Being happy involves doing the things that really light your fire! Having fun is good for your health, so make it a priority.
Make sure to plan time to have fun with the people who treat you right and that you most enjoy being with.
10. Don't stop believing in yourself
Don't give up on you. Don't let other's opinions bring you down. Remember, it's only their opinion and it can always change.
Learn how to take care of yourself. Start every day with a positive affirmation and focus on it during the day, especially when that critical voice pops inside your head.
Start with just one of these steps today. You will begin to love and accept yourself more. Just imagine what a happy life will be like when you start practicing all of these steps.
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Lianne Avila is a Marriage and Family Therapist. She has been helping others for fourteen years and absolutely loves her work. Please visit Lessons for Love for more help.
This article was originally published at Lessons for Love. Reprinted with permission from the author.