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How do you learn to love yourself?
By Kitty Robinson — Written on Jan 07, 2020
An important part of learning how to love yourself and beginning to build your self-esteem is by practicing self-care.
Learning how to be better to yourself can be difficult, but it's not impossible.
When it comes to love, you often think of falling in love with someone else. But I think the first and most important person to fall in love with is yourself.
Yes, it’s important to love other people, but how can you love each other when the skill hasn’t been mastered with one’s self? Refer to the phrase “You can’t pour from an empty cup.”
Well, the same thing goes with love. Ask yourself, how can you pour love into someone else without having self-love.
Here are five tips to help you learn how to love yourself. Once you’ve mastered loving you, you will be able to be your most authentic self and give much more to others.
1. Get to know the real you.
A large percentage of what we think about ourselves comes from the beliefs of someone else.
For example, letting people from our childhood plant negative beliefs in our minds, letting those beliefs grow and giving them the power to determine who and what we are as a person.
Well, now it’s time to get rid of those limits because what others think and feel about you does not determine your self-worth.
2. Start spending time with yourself.
Take yourself out on dates. Implement self-care daily. If you don’t enjoy spending time with yourself, who else will?
Learn your likes and dislikes so when pouring love into others you will already know and feel confident in what you will and won’t do. Increased confidence increases self-love.
3. Accept your flaws.
Learn to accept yourself! No one is perfect. When you realize this and refrain from criticizing yourself, you will find peace. You are your own worst critic. You criticize yourself because others have criticized you.
You criticize others for this very same reason. Stop doing this to yourself. When you find yourself being negative or criticizing yourself, send love your way.
Repeat to yourself, “I will not criticize myself or others” then say something positive to yourself like, “I will love and accept my flaws." Positive affirmations are a great way to fall in love with yourself, which leads me to my next tip.
4. Do reflective soul work.
Reflective soul work is a technique I’ve created that requires you to look in the mirror and repeat positive affirmations to yourself, preferably daily.
This not only helps you love and believe in yourself but it boosts self-esteem and confidence. How often do you really look at yourself and send love and positivity our way? Don’t wait on others to do this for you! Grab a mirror and get to work.
5. Allow yourself room to make mistakes and correct them.
Understand that life is a journey and you are constantly learning and growing. Go easy on yourself and know that success comes from making mistakes. You are successful no matter what obstacles you face!
Self-love is the best love! Now go love yourself and watch your relationships grow!
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Kitty Robinson is a licensed professional counselor and motivational speaker who wants to help you embrace your inner self with love. For more information on how she can help you, visit her website.