Photo: WeHeartIt
Get a head start on sexy time before you're even in the same room.
By Jessica M. Miller — Written on Aug 28, 2015
Between the bills, managing the household, and running late for soccer practice (again), who wouldn’t want to take a break and receive a secret sexy text from their spouse?
In a recent poll, 75 percent of those in committed relationships admit to sexting and swear that the benefits outweigh the risks.
If it’s so beneficial, why doesn’t EVERYONE do it?
Well for starters, some are more shy or have been stuck in their "mommy role" for way too long, which makes this flirtatious act awkward or even embarrassing. Not to mention the "what if's" are SCARY as hell.
Before you dismiss the idea, however, let's just take a peak at some perks that sexting brings:
1. Sexting instantaneously makes your relationship more fun.
It puts you back into the flirtatious sweet spot you might not have felt since you were first dating. And when you flirt, your body responds by releasing a cocktail of feel good hormones that make you feel alive.
2. Sexting seduces your mind before you connect bodies.
In another study, researchers found that the quality of sex in a relationship matters more than quantity, and one of the most important factors in quality is anticipation. When we look forward to something, we release chemicals that make us feel joy and happiness.
3. Having a sexy secret brings you two closer together.
Since just the two of you know about this sexy photo swap, you feel special and connected.
Things to remember:
First, set healthy boundaries with your partner. Discuss what the best practices would look have to look like in order to calm your concerns.
If you're going to participate in this practice, make sure you're in a safe and committed relationship. This will help with your fear of leaked photos. Also, make sure you turn off all automatic uploads from your mobile device to your Cloud storage.
Another strategy to keep your sexy snaps a secret is to agree to enjoy the sext and then delete the evidence. If you have children, be sure to safeguard your kids from accidently coming across any photos of daddy's privates.
If you're still not sure, just remember that sexting isn’t for everyone.
Not ready for sexting? You can simply reintroduce the act of flirting into your marriage and have similar results. Remember: as women, feeling sexy doesn't diminish as we age or birth babies. This is something we get to experience forever. Or at least should be.
Talk to your spouse tonight about reintroducing some lighthearted fun back into the relationship. Sometimes just externalizing the awkwardness diminishes our anxiety and apprehension.
Happy sexting (and flirting)!
Jessica is a syndicated writer that blogs regularly at JMiller Coaching. Read an excerpt of her book Back to Love here. You can also follow her on Twitter.
