Why You Should Love Your Man Like A Lover, Not Like His Mother

You wash his clothes, you iron his shirts, and you make him dinner. You're downright indispensable and you can't see how he could make it without you.

You want him to know you love him. You text him when you don't hear from him. He says he misses you even though he has no plans of seeing you. You tell him you miss him too. You love him but you're unhappy.

You're wondering what you're doing wrong. Why isn't he doing anything?

The next thing you know, you're in a relationship with a man who doesn't treat you well. And now you want to know how to be a good lover, how to love him better. 

The problem is doing all these for a man doesn't make him love you. Men fall in love when they give, not when they receive.

You mean well but you have one small problem. You're acting like his mother. The challenge is that men are not turned on by their mothers. Stop doing that. It's a bad habit that you need to change right now.

What are you doing? You're over doing.

No good deed goes unpunished. When you have to do everything for a man because you can't bear to see him in discomfort, you're hurting yourself. If you want a man to love you as his lover and not his mother, you have to know this. 

When a man loves a woman, it's his pleasure to love her. He enjoys giving to you, protecting you, caring about how you feel, and winning you over, not pushing you over.

A mother loves her son unconditionally. This is not a good recipe for loving a man. Real men are not looking for a mother. They are looking for a lover. Do they want to know they're loved? Absolutely. The difference is that they want to earn it.

When you give too much to a man, he turns child-like and disrespectful. He becomes too secure, which is great if you're his mother but a disaster if you're his lover.

You become a man's lover when you stop overdoing. Let him call and let him text you. Men have a different rhythm than you.

Real men know that women, children, animals and the planet are not here for their gratification. They know if they want love, they have to earn it. They want to know you love them, just not more than yourself.

James Allen Hanrahan is a dating relationship coach in Los Angeles. Get his FREE Chemistry to Commitment formula for lasting love.

This article was originally published at jamesallenhanrahan.com. Reprinted with permission from the author.