3 Types Of Orgasms Women Should Experience — And The Ancient Chinese Method For Making That Happen
Game-changer.
Unsplash: Alexander Krivitskiy For many women, an orgasm is a fleeting experience, even a mythical creature. Some women even ask questions like, "What is an orgasm?" and, "What does an orgasm feel like?" because they have never experienced one. For other women, they're even wondering how to orgasm in the first place.
A female orgasm is typically defined as a series of rhythmic contractions or pulsations in the vagina or "an intense pleasurable release of sexual tension ... accompanied by contractions of the genital muscles."
I would add to this that orgasm is about a build up of energy that suddenly starts to move, causing these vibrations and involuntary contractions.
Sexologists classically describe three kinds of female orgasms:
- Clitoral orgasm: generally brought on by clitoral stimulation, and characterized by contractions and vibrations in the vagina entrance
- G-Spot orgasm: generally brought on by stimulation of the G-spot, and characterized by deeper contractions from further within the vagina, and which may also cause female ejaculation or "squirting"
- Cervical orgasm: which occurs when the cervix also starts to vibrate and move or contract.
These descriptions are helpful to know, but if you've never experienced an orgasm of any kind, let alone all three, the information may seem difficult to make sense of.
According to research conducted by psychologist Susan Nolen-Hoeksema of Yale University, fewer than 5 percent of women have a disorder known as anorgasmia, which is defined as "a type of sexual dysfunction in which a person cannot achieve orgasm despite adequate stimulation."
However, as many as two-thirds of women do not experience regular orgasms.
This is a shocking statistic.
As stated by Michael Castleman, who's been writing about sexuality and sex research for well over three decades:
"Only 25 percent of women are consistently orgasmic during vaginal intercourse.
"This bears repeating: Only one-quarter of women reliably experience orgasm during intercourse-no matter how long it lasts, no matter what size the man's penis, and no matter how the woman feels about the man or the relationship.
"This statistic comes not from just one study, but from a comprehensive analysis of 33 studies over the past 80 years ... Rounding things out: About half of women sometimes have orgasms during intercourse. About 20 percent seldom or ever have orgasms during intercourse. And about 5 percent never have orgasms, period."
So while doctors may have told you that you are anorgasmic and there is nothing anyone can do about it, the high probably is that this simply isn't true.
Not only can nearly every woman have orgasms, but most woman can also have multiple orgasms. In fact, it's my belief that an orgasm, which is a movement of energy, can be experienced in any part of the body.
Simply put, these vibrations result from a movement of energy. If you're not having orgasms, or not having as many orgasms as you'd like, it’s because energy is not moving.
Energy moves best in a relaxed body. Tension stops the flow of energy and also causes pain.
You may have heard the Chinese term "chi" or "qi", which refers to the life force.
It's like electricity, and is what gives us life. An intense orgasm actually feels electric because it is a movement of your energy or chi.
Research shows that anorgasmia in women may often be attributed to psychological causes such as the following:
- Mental health problems, such as anxiety or depression
- Poor body image
- Stress and financial pressures
- Cultural and religious beliefs
- Embarrassment
- Guilt about enjoying sex
- Past sexual or emotional abuse
- Relationship issues such as lack of connection, unresolved conflicts, poor communication of sexual needs and preferences, infidelity or breach of trust and intimate partner violence
These conditions all make it hard to relax and cause tension.
It’s important to work on the underlying causes, whether through conventional medical intervention or therapy, or through alternative medicine and practices like yoga.
However, I'm going to share with you an ancient Chinese practice that is tremendously effective for getting that energy flowing.
This method, called "the Deer Exercise", comes from a meditative practice known as Sexual Alchemy.
It’s a Taoist practice that works on getting the sexual energy flowing through the body, and it’s quite powerful.
This is what you do:
- Sit on your bed with your legs crossed, if possible, with a heel covering your vagina so the energy does not escape.
- Start by rubbing your hands together to warm them, and then massage your breasts using circular movements, clockwise first and then counter-clockwise. Do this for up to 10 minutes, ideally. You will notice a sensation. It’s the hormones being released into your body. The powerful energy is being directed to your glands as it rejuvenates you.
- Next, massage your ovaries and feel the energy spread. You can also massage your womb.
- After this, massage the entrance of your vagina, slowly and deliberately moving in clockwise and then counter-clockwise directions as before. Whatever you feel tempted to do, continue with slow circles.
- As you finish, take in a long, deep breath, and as you do, tightly pull up your pelvic floor. Hold your breath for a similar amount of time, and finally, release your breath at the same you release the pelvic floor contraction, exhaling slowly.
This magical exercise will change your whole body.
Set aside a special time and space to start doing this regularly. Call it your little quiet spot and pamper yourself. It feels great and also is great for your general energy levels.
You will start to feel electric. Keep up the practice and see what happens.
The reason I feel so confident saying this works is that I know from first-hand experience, because I used to be anorgasmic.
I couldn't even comprehend what an orgasm was. My boyfriend would ask me why I didn’t have an orgasm, and I couldn’t even understand what he meant. Not only was this embarrassing, it was frustrating. I knew I was missing out on something, but didn’t really know what it was.
Then I discovered Sexual Alchemy, and within a few months I was multi-orgasmic. The rest is history!
Jade Lotus is a tantra educator and teaches Taoist Sexual Alchemy, who specializes in erectile dysfunction (ED) issues and premature ejaculation.