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5 Ways To Make A Man Feel Deeply Attached To You

Photo: Unsplash: Toa Heftiba
How To Make A Guy Fall In Love With You
Love

He won't want to let you go.

For most women, the hardest part about their love life isn't meeting or establishing an attraction with men, but rather, it’s creating that deep connection and rush of strong emotions and powerful feelings that move things forward from the casual dating stage toward committed, romantic relationships.

In short, it's understanding the key factors of how to make a guy fall deeply in love with you.

This transition can be a pain point for many women who can’t seem to get past point of casually dating a guy — and who can't, for the life of them, figure out why.

RELATED: How To Make A Man Fall In Love With You, According To His Personality Type

The reason for this isn't that men are "commitment phobes," as so many would have you believe. It’s that a guy hasn't felt deeply attached to them on an emotional level.

As we all know, physical attraction fades over time, and it's the quality of our emotional connection with each other — or the lack thereof — that makes or breaks a relationship.

Here are 5 ways to make a guy fall deeply in love with you without playing games.

1. Date him for who he is, not for his potential

Everyone wants to be accepted and loved for who they are, but many women make the mistake of dating a guy for his potential, i.e., the man he could become in five years (with your help, of course).

But men aren’t projects. When you have an expectation for a man to change, he feels like you’re not seeing him for who he is. For some men, it could make them feel shame, like they’re not enough. If a guy feels this at the beginning of a relationship, he’ll likely cut and run.

When I've asked happily married men what it was about their wife that made them think, “Yes, she’s the one,” they've often said something along the lines of, "She never tried to change me."

Know what you’re looking for in a guy and find someone who matches that description.

2. Create emotional safety for him

Creating emotional safety means creating a space where someone can express their thoughts, feelings, and desires without feeling judged. When men refer to a woman as being easy to talk to, they mean that they're able to say things they typically wouldn't share with anyone else, because they know they won't be made to feel judged.

The next time your man is having a bad day, complaining about his frustration with a colleague, or telling you something personal, listen to him without judgment. Know when to fix a problem, when to offer help, and when to simply listen. Sometimes people don’t want their problems fixed, they just want someone to hear them out.

RELATED: How To Make A Man Fall In Love With You In 9 Easy Steps (Yes, Really!)

3. Keep things light and playful

People remember you based on the experiences you share together. The more positive and fun experiences you share, the more someone associates those feelings with you.

Men and women have different relationship timelines. Women tend to jump into relationships, eager to define their status and skipping over many of the fun aspects of dating, while men often take a little longer to decide if they want to pursue the relationship further.

It's important to keep the beginning of a relationship light and playful, because to a guy, even if he really, really likes you, you're still just dating.

4. Be vulnerable

The fastest way to create emotional intimacy with someone is to drop your guard and show your vulnerability. When you show someone an unfiltered version of yourself, you’re essentially giving them the key to explore every intimate detail about you, and that's a huge responsibility.

Think of what it feels like when you’ve gained someone’s trust like that. Incredible right?

When you show people your vulnerability, you creating emotional safety for a guy to do the same.

5. Give him space to chase you

One of the most common scenarios I get asked about is what to do when a guy stops chasing you.

The answer is often, "Do nothing."

When you're in panic mode, you approach things from from a place of fear.

I see many women who panic as soon as they think a guy is pulling away. They panic when a guy doesn’t text or call one day, or if he seems a little distant at dinner. Scared that their man is pulling away, they will overcompensate for his aloofness by trying to take control of the relationship. They'll start calling the guy, makes all the plans, generally attempting to lead the relationship where they want it to go.

When this happens, it causes a role reversal, and without either one consciously realizing as it happens, the guy becomes the one being chased. This shift in dynamic is one many men aren't comfortable with, and so when faced with this situation, they tend to withdraw even more.

Give the guy you're falling for the space to chase you.

When you create a life you love, you create a life he wants to be part of.

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If you want to learn more about men and commitment and how you can go from casual dating to a loving and committed relationship, visit Goodbye Casual Dating for more details.