7 Simple (Yet Essential) Traits EVERY Marriage Needs To Succeed

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Fun marriage

Actually, the path to a better marriage is simpler than you might think!

Some say "marriage is dead" — We 100% disagree!

Not only do we think marriage is here to stay, we think marriage is better than ever (if you know the ingredients needed to keep love alive and thriving). 

Positive examples of marriage and long-term relationships abound — they are everywhere! Successful and long-term relationships are the single greatest contributors to social order in the world today.  And for over three decades we've studied happy marriages around the globe to discover the secret to building a love that lasts

Successful relationships and marriages all require simple acts, gestures, and conversations. These simple things, consistently done, create a foundation for rock solid love that lasts. 

So join the ranks of other happy couples. Here are the seven key ingredients that define a successful marriage:

1. Togetherness

In successful marriage it is not you and me, it is WE! Two separate people become one team, without losing their individual identities. Compromise is a part of daily living in a marriage. No one can have it all his or her way.

2. Respect

Happy marriages focus on mutual love and respect. Respecting your spouses individuality and opinion is critical to building a love that lasts.

3. Truthfulness

Couples talk about anything and everything. In successful marriage there are no sacred cows — no secrets. When difficult issues arise, successfully married couples have open discussions, solve issues jointly and never go to bed mad.

4. Joint Finances

In successful marriage it is "OUR money." It is NOT "your money" and "my money." Never make a major purchase without talking it over with your spouse and then sleeping on it. Pay all of your bills together. It’s important that both of you understand your finances.

5. Fitness 

Successfully married couples understand that taking care of just themselves physically is not sufficient. You must also promote the good health of your spouse. To live until "death do us part" requires a mutual concern about one another's good health. Using common sense about what you put into your body, getting proper exercise, rest and relaxation is beneficial to the health of both of you.

6. The Power of Touch

In successful marriage touching says, "I love you so much I simply must touch you." Touching each other multiple times per day is the norm. Use touch as your Morse code and create an exclamation mark of your love.

7. Surprise

Marriages characterized by variety and spice are the best. Successful marriage is exciting — rarely boring — and full of unpredictable things. Don’t always do that which is predictable. Upend expectations. Variety is the spice of life!

There is nothing mysterious or mystical about building a love that lasts. But the truth is, too many couples don't understand or won't do the simple things required to make their marriage work.

In the end, a successful marriage is all about doing the simple things day in and day out. Start today. You won't regret it.

There is a path to a better marriage!

Dr. Charles and Dr. Elizabeth Schmitz are America's #1 Love and Marriage Experts, authors of the best seller Building a Love that Lasts and keynote speakers at the Better Marriage Conference. Discover what happily married women know about what makes a man marriage material and learn other revealing truths in How to Marry the Right Guy.