The 3 Biggest Turn-Offs For Alpha Males (& How To Keep Him Hooked)

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alpha male

Here's how to appeal to his inner alpha.

Statistically, about 10% of men in the world would be considered an ‘alpha male’.

An alpha male is a leader of the pack. He runs his own business, his family, and his life. There are such a small percentage of them because the world can only sustain so many leaders. If there were any more alphas, we would be at each others' throats constantly. There would be too much testosterone, too much masculine energy out there. 

That's why we need the more feminine men to balance it out. We need the beta guys. These men are a commodity.  

I know for a fact that most women crave dating an alpha guy in some way.  Even if you like nerdier or quiet guys, you want him to be an alpha in some way, shape, and form.

The thing is, humans crave what they fear the most. (Why do you think so many men end up dating their mothers?) But when they get what they fear, they seem to ruin it.

Most women, when they're given the guy they really, really want, over-think it and ruin their chances.

Here are a few ways you might be ruining your chances with the alpha guy of your dreams:

1. You go into Sherlock Holmes mode.

You start over-analyzing every single thing the man says. You stop trusting what he tells you. Most women, when they get the guy they want the most, think it’s too good to be true. They trick themselves into believing this man is lying. Maybe he’s cheating. There’s no way he'd stay out with friends late...

They become paranoid and when they become paranoid they turn to their own Dr. Watson. Every woman has one. Who do you turn to when you're not sure how to handle a sexual partner? Who gives you most of your dating advice? This is your Watson.

You're Sherlock Holmes, you have a meeting with all of your girlfriends, and you sit around and you break down what this guy says.

And of course, Watson's going to come up with something that's going to be extraordinarily stupid. You see, Watson doesn't know enough about the guy you're dating to have an informed opinion. You trust Watson so you listen to him (her). When an alpha guy feels like a woman doesn't trust him, he'll get bored instantly and he'll go on to the next. 

Alpha's have options. They won't stand for being falsely accused. If he's got to be constantly reassuring you, he'll get bored and move on.

2. You don't go with the flow.

You slow the flow down because you're so nervous and you don't communicate why you're nervous.  So the alpha guy starts thinking, where was this cool girl that I met in the beginning?

You hold out, maybe you don't call him or text him back. Or maybe you hold off on sex too long. And he starts to get bored.

An alpha male presents himself to you. You've got to go for the ride. The ride is never going to make you feel 100 percent secure. When you're dating an alpha guy, you're not in control. It's the heart of what scares most women away from alpha men.

You like to be in control. It's the way you are wired as a female. And with an alpha guy, you're not in control at all. It's scary. It makes you vulnerable. Isn't that what you wanted in the first place? Don't you want to let go of control, and just go with the flow?  There's no guarantee in any relationship.

It may not work with the alpha guy. But if you self-sabotage it, it's not going to work at all.

3. You bust their balls.

When you ball bust an alpha guy, you're taking a guillotine to the relationship. An alpha is looking for a woman to admire him. They're looking for a woman that supports them. They're looking for a woman that adds to their life. If you're an alpha woman and you like to compete with your man, then you're going to lose him right away.  An alpha man is not interested in dating a woman with a penis. 

He doesn't want a woman who walks with her penis, talks with her penis and tries to out-penis him throughout the day. So, if you're a successful woman, which a lot of you are, and you needed to be alpha in order to be successful in the world, stay away from alphas.

The last thing the alpha guy wants to do is deal with another alpha in the bedroom. He craves the feminine being that you are. He craves to be flirted with. Remember ladies, there are not many alpha guys out there.  So, if you have one in your realm, please avoid these mistakes so you can keep your alpha guy.

David Wygant is a dating coach who has been helping men and women for over 20 years. For more great dating advice, visit David's website.