Love

The 3 Biggest Turn-Offs For Alpha Males (& How To Keep Them Hooked)

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Statistically, about 10 percent of men in the world would be considered "alpha males."

What is an alpha male?

An alpha male is the leader of the pack. He runs his own business, his family, and his life.

There is such a small percentage of them because the world can only sustain so many leaders. If there were any more alphas, we would be at each others' throats constantly. There would be too much testosterone and masculine energy out there. 

That's why we need more feminine men to balance it out. We need the beta guys. These men are a commodity.  

I know for a fact that most women crave dating an alpha guy in some way. Even if you like nerdier or quiet guys, you want him to be an alpha in some way, shape, and form.

The thing is, humans, crave what they fear the most. But when they get what they fear, they seem to ruin it. Most women, when they're given the guy they really want, overthink it and ruin their chances.

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Here are the 3 biggest turn-offs for alpha males in relationships.

1. You go into Sherlock Holmes mode

You start over-analyzing every single thing the man says. You stop trusting what he tells you.

Most women, when they get the guy they want the most, think it’s too good to be true. They trick themselves into believing this man is lying. Maybe he’s cheating. There’s no way he'd stay out with friends late.

They become paranoid, and when they become paranoid they turn to their own Dr. Watson. Every woman has one. Who do you turn to when you're not sure how to handle a partner? Who gives you most of your dating advice? This is your Watson.

You're Sherlock Holmes. You have a meeting with all of your girlfriends, and you sit around and you break down what this guy says.

And, of course, Watson's going to come up with something that's going to be extraordinarily stupid. You see, Watson doesn't know enough about the guy you're dating to have an informed opinion. You trust Watson so you listen to him (her).

When an alpha guy feels like a woman doesn't trust him, he'll get bored instantly and he'll go on to the next. Alphas have options. They won't stand for being falsely accused. If he's got to be constantly reassuring you, he'll get bored and move on.

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2. You don't go with the flow

You slow the flow down because you're so nervous and you don't communicate why you're nervous. So, the alpha guy starts thinking, Where was this cool girl that I met in the beginning?

You hold out. Maybe you don't call him or text him back, or maybe you hold off on being intimate for too long. And he starts to get bored.

An alpha male presents himself to you, so you've got to go for the ride. The ride is never going to make you feel 100 percent secure. When you're dating an alpha guy, you're not in control. It's the heart of what scares most women away from alpha men.

You like to be in control; it's the way you're wired as a woman. And with an alpha guy, you're not in control at all. It's scary. It makes you vulnerable. Isn't that what you wanted in the first place? Don't you want to let go of control, and just go with the flow? 

There's no guarantee in any relationship. It may not work with the alpha guy. But if you self-sabotage it, it's not going to work at all.

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3. You give him a hard time

When you do this to an alpha guy, you're taking a guillotine to the relationship. Alpha is looking for a woman to admire him. They're looking for a woman that supports them, a woman that adds to their life.

If you're an alpha woman and you like to compete with your man, you're going to lose him right away. An alpha man is not interested in dating a woman who is more masculine than him.

So, if you're a successful woman, which a lot of you are, and you need to be alpha in order to be successful in the world, stay away from alphas. The last thing an alpha male wants to do is deal with another alpha in the bedroom. He craves the feminine being that you are. He craves to be flirted with.

Remember ladies: there aren't many alphas out there. So, if you have one in your realm, avoid these mistakes so you can keep your guy.

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David Wygant is a dating/relationship coach who has been featured on MTV, Bravo, NBC, LA Times, and more.