If You Want To Find Your Soulmate, You’ll Need To Get This Relationship Right First

How To Find Your Soulmate & Have Healthy Relationships With Self Love, Self Worth, Self Care, Self esteem, & Independence
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Love

True love is possible.

Wondering how to find your soulmate, life partner, and your one, true love? There's a few things you need to do first. Real love is out there, but to find it, you'll want to balance your feminine and masculine energy first. 

Feminine and masculine energies aren't just about being a man or a woman. You can find your true love, and the relationship you've always wanted by developing a balance of both energies within.

Everyone is looking for love, but we are programed to think that love is outside of ourselves. Many people search to find their soulmate so they can live "happily ever after" or "finally start their life."

RELATED: How To Find Your Soulmate & Perfect Life Partner In 5 Simple Steps

Consciously — or unconsciously — we are all searching for our true love. It's an impulse, desire, hope, and dream — a part of who we are and our evolutionary process.  Therefore, this search is not completely a bad thing. It's just a bit misdirected, but it's not our fault.

Look at all the romance movies we see. They always end happily. The guy comes running back declaring his love for the leading lady and they live "happily ever after."

Does this happen in real life? Not really.

You were sold a dream instead of learning how to create real, healthy relationships. Along the way, we have to learn how to go through the hardships and come out the other side with an open heart instead of piled up resentments.

Relationships have become disposable. When it gets too hard, how often have you thought, "I'll just find another." The "other" you need to find is you.

According to the 2017 Census Bureau, there was a record number of unmarried, adults in the United States, which seems like a good thing to me.  

Many people are afraid to be single for fear of being alone. But, it's a rite of passage to fully embrace being single.

Have you had a time in your life when you were fully single? No one on the horizon? Just you, yourself and you. Or have you always been in a relationship?

When you're single do you spent most of your time searching for another relationship? If you are, stop looking for "the one" and start looking for a balance of feminine and masculine energy within yourself.

Be your own man and buy yourself flowers. Be your own woman and nurture yourself by taking a nice bath.

Embracing Sacred Singlehood

RELATED: 12 Reasons Being Single Is Freaking Awesome

What is Sacred Singlehood? You don't know what life will bring you, or if a relationship will last. You've probably already been through a breakup, so you know the pain of loss and separation, maybe even betrayal.

Sacred Singlehood is when you claim yourself as your beloved during those times that you are single.

You take yourself on dates, you enjoy spending time with yourself, and you make a commitment during this time to deepen your relationship with yourself — to foster self-love, self-worth, and self-care.

Sacred Singlehood is a beautiful time.

When you embrace your time of not being with another as a time to develop the relationship you have with you, it's powerfully transforming.

Then, when you do get into a relationship, setting healthy boundaries and speaking your truth won't be so hard because you're not afraid to be by yourself. This is empowering.

You stay in a relationship not for security or out of fear of being alone, but rather because you enjoy the love.

Once you can build this relationship with yourself, you'll have the self-esteem and independence to build a truly healthy relationship with your soulmate. 

Feminine and masculine energy and role mates

The 1950's are a good example of traditional feminine and masculine energy roles. The men were men and the women were women.

You knew as a woman you were supposed to grow up, get married and have kids. Your job was to find a good provider and father to your children.

Men were supposed to be in charge, rule the roost, be the boss, and be the breadwinner for the family. A man's job was to find a good wife to bare his children.

But, things have changed since then. The roles of what a woman should do and what a man should do are not so well defined anymore. There is more flexibility to express their unique selves.

The idea of having children just because you thought you were supposed to is not a good reason to have children.

Children need parents who are excited to have them in their lives. It's a big responsibility, and if you are going to do it, it's really important to be into it.

We are moving away from the traditional norms of role mates with well-defined ways of creating families, to a more creative way of living.

Dads can be a stay-at-home dads, and moms can pursue a career. 

The traditional family unit still exists but now there are many different types of families. Life is not so well defined anymore.

This allows everyone to move away from those well-defined male and female roles and focus on finding true love with their soulmates. Not out of necessity, but out of actual love, attraction, and admiration. 

Feminine and masculine energy and soulmates

RELATED: 10 Ways To Attract True Love & Find Your Twin Flame

The ideas of soulmates and a twin flame are popular among those looking for love. Many people seem to be looking for long-term relationships, but most people now have at least one divorce in their lifetime and have had multiple lovers.

We are moving away from a society where women are financially dependent upon men, so women don't stay stuck in relationships for years on end like they used to.

They might have even evolved to the point where they are in relationships because they choose to be with a certain someone, not because they are stuck with them.

This is an evolutionary process of moving from role mates to soulmates to autonomous heart-empowered people.

You free yourself from defined and rigid rules of what and how men and women should be and, instead, be your unique and wondrous selves.

Then, from this place of free self-expression, you create loving, healthy relationships in which you enjoy the other's company, and learn from each other.

You will only create these joyous, free, more expressive relationships with someone when you have cultivated self-love and self-worth within yourself first.

Your true love is you

After all the relationship dramas of divorce, breakups, betrayals, and miscommunications, all you have to do is fall in love with yourself.

You are your true love! All you have to do is be true to you. Do you set healthy boundaries for yourself? Or do you lose yourself in a relationship? How much do you really nurture and take care of yourself, emotionally?

You can try Inner Beloved Astrology readings, during which you will be introduced to your astrological feminine and masculine energy imprints.

Astrologically speaking, no matter what your sexual orientation is, women need to develop their inner masculine and men need to develop their inner feminine.

The idea is that, relationship or not, you are walking with your inner man or inner woman by your side at all times. This creates, within you, the sacred marriage — an alchemical transformation that supports self-love.

RELATED: The Cold, Hard, Surprising Truth About Soulmates

Your inner man is your protector. He keeps you safe, helps you speak up for yourself and sets healthy boundaries for you. Your Inner Woman is your softer side. She helps you to be receptive to new ideas, tune into other's needs and be compassionate.

You need both energies, qualities, and benefits of both feminine and masculine energy, no matter what gender you are.

This is becoming more and more important as you move away from the role mate mentality.

Embracing both your feminine and masculine energy is an important part of becoming an independent person. A person who doesn't look outside themselves for answers or look outside themselves for love.

You are your own authority and your own love. It is through that deeper sense of self-love that you create a better, more evolved, healthier relationship with others.

This is an important part of our human evolution. You are your own true love.

Honor your feminine and masculine energy. Know the difference between your masculine and feminine energy and then you can finally find your soulmate. 

RELATED: If He's Really Your Soulmate, Your Relationship Will Have These 10 Things

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Anna-Thea is an author and Divine Feminine Educator. Learn to love your feminine side. And if you want to find out more about developing a deeper relationship with yourself and create more fulfilling relationships check out her online courses.

This article was originally published at annathea.org. Reprinted with permission from the author.

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