Woman's Mother Demands To Accompany Her To The Gynecologist — 'Quit Acting Like Your Body Is Sacred. I Want Grandchildren'
A sense of entitlement does not give anyone the right to violate your privacy.
Iryna Inshyna / Shutterstock For many women, feminine health is a private matter to be shared only at their discretion. But one woman was especially shocked when her mother felt entitled to be at her gynecological appointment, despite her discomfort.
A woman says her mother demanded to accompany her to a gynecology exam.
In a post shared to the r/entitledparents subreddit, a 24-year-old woman sought input on the situation between she and her mom.
She started by saying, “My mom knew about my appointment and that I was going to be examined (clothing would be removed). She wanted to accompany me last minute for support and I couldn't argue with her to stay home, or I would be late.”
The woman assumed her mother would wait patiently outside for her to finish.
The mom apparently tried to enter the examination room with her daughter, but was kept out by clinic staff. She later “barged” into the room under the guise of sharing some important family history with the doctor.
Staff reacted quickly, removing her from the room and locking the door. Not having access to her daughter's exam, however, upset her enough that she left before the appointment even ended.
The young woman tried explaining that discussing her past relationships and sexual history in front of her mom made her very uncomfortable, so she wanted to be seen alone. She was also surprised that her mom even wanted to be present for such a personal moment.
Her mother wants grandkids and felt that she should stop acting like her body is sacred.
In response to her concerns, the woman’s mother failed to understand why it was such a big deal. She implored the young lady to get comfortable showing her body since medical staff would always have a need to see it.
The hopeful future grandma also shared that her husband had always accompanied her to the gynecologist.
“I told her a spouse is way different than a parent and that since she hates to talk about sex and has s--t-shamed me in the past (she is very religious and hated to see me with anyone) there was no reason for her to be there,” the poster said.
She also added that at the time of the appointment, she was temporarily staying at her parent’s home but had since moved out and that the examination was not related to fertility at all.
It is perfectly okay to establish boundaries with your parents.
While some people may want to have their parents accompany them to doctor's appointments, in this case, the daughter made her boundaries clear; however, her mother still violated them, all in the name of wanting grandchildren.
But in cases like this, it's more than okay to set boundaries with your loved ones, especially if they are making you uncomfortable or crossing certain lines. For example, with this young woman, her mother violated her privacy, even after she specifically stated she wanted to have the exam alone.
It's a good reminder that as we grow from children to adults, it can be difficult for some parents to transition from a caretaker role. Just because they brought you into this world, that does not entitle them to the private details of your life.
Adult children and parents must be able to navigate from authority figure and subordinate to reciprocal adults who give and get respect, ask for help when they truly want it, and allow each other the space to make good decisions.
When parents abide by the boundaries their children set, it makes room for a healthy, stable relationship.
NyRee Ausler is a writer from Seattle, Washington. She covers lifestyle, relationships, and human-interest stories that readers can relate to and that bring social issues to the forefront for discussion.