Woman Wonders If She’s Wrong For Exposing Friend Who Secretly Visits Her Husband When She’s Not Home

She told her friend's husband what she's been doing.

Couples having dinner Stock Rocket / Shutterstock

A woman in a long-distance relationship has found herself looking to the internet for some unique advice on a situation involving her partner.

She wrote to Reddit's r/AmITheA-hole, a subreddit where strangers vote on who was in the wrong in each other's personal problems.

In her post, she details how her husband's housekeeper opened her eyes to an unexpected visitor that had been coming to her home. 


The woman learned that the wife of her husband's friend kept trying to visit her husband.

The woman begins her post by explaining that her primary residence is in the United Kingdom and her husband's home is in Italy. They make their relationship work long-distance but recently ran into some issues.

RELATED: Woman's Reaction To Learning Her Fiancé Has A 'Work Wife' Sparks Debate About Emotional Cheating

"[My husband's] housekeeper told me that the wife of my husband's friend kept trying to visit him while I wasn't there. She said she came over every single day even though most days he wasn't even home or was working from home so didn't even say hello to her," she said in her post.


Naturally, this caused some concern for the woman, so she wanted to confront the other lady.

She asked her to stop trying to see her husband because he was always busy with his work. 

The two couples were out together and she decided to seize an opportunity to speak to the other woman alone.

She asked her to stop visiting unannounced, saying her husband didn't wish to be interrupted while he is working.

The woman suggested that she "arrange something instead of just turning up." But the friend's wife didn't take too well to the advice and "acted like it was no big deal."

She asked her to stop several more times but, as soon as she was back in the UK, the woman kept visiting her husband unannounced. 


She contacted the woman's husband about it when she got fed up.

She told him about the situation and asked him to speak to his wife. He was unaware of what was happening and agreed to speak to her.

Unfortunately, this has only caused the woman to become even more angry and dismissive.

"She said I was treating her like her husband's property and I was pathetic for telling him instead of just admitting she made me insecure," the woman added in her post. 

RELATED: Private Investigator Hired To Catch Cheaters Reveals What Red Flags To Look Out For

The Reddit poster's husband has now said she caused chaos in their friend circle as everybody is now gossiping about it. She's asked the subreddit if she was in the wrong for what she did.


People have agreed that the woman is not the a-hole. 

But one commenter asked why the original poster's husband did not tell her. 

The woman clarified, though, saying her husband did not think it was important but also was not made aware that she kept coming over since he was never home and his housekeeper did not inform him.

Others suspect her husband is not telling the truth, implying that he could be playing dumb about all of this. 


Whatever the reasoning, all have agreed she isn't the aggressor in this situation but should do a little more investigation; hiring a private investigator could reveal what is going on. 

RELATED: Why I Decided To Be Friends With 'The Other Woman'

Kurtis Condra is a writer for YourTango, based in San Francisco, California. His expertise includes pop-culture deep dives, human interest stories, and news. When not writing for YourTango, he focuses on his poetry. You can follow his poetic journey on​ Instagram.