Woman Shunned By Her Friends For Not Laughing At An Offensive Joke — 'Why Am I Dealing With Mean Girls At 30?'

Unfortunately, not everyone outgrows their 'mean girl' phase.

woman being shunned for not laughing at offensive joke tiktok @emily.giangreco / TikTok

When we typically think of the mean girl stereotype, we picture teenagers. Unfortunately, it appears some women never outgrow their mean girl phase, with one woman explaining her experience with 30-year-old mean girls.

A Woman was socially outcast for not laughing at an offensive joke. 

TikTok user Emily Giangreco recently used her platform to talk about the “mean girl” actions of her “friends” when she moved to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania. Giangreco opened up her TikTok with, “I’m 30 years old and I’m still dealing with mean girls.” 


Giangreco explained that when she first moved to Pittsburgh, “everyone in my building was honestly really welcoming.” She then discussed the details of one woman who had made an insensitive and offensive joke about women. Specifically, towards women who had dealt with traumatic experiences. Giangreco explained that she did not laugh at the joke and instead said, “I don’t think you should be making comments like that”.

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Giangreco said, “Ever since then, she decided not to like me and she told the rest of the group to not like me either.”


Giangreco explained that she was left out of events and conversations for speaking up.

The husbands and boyfriends of her “friends” said that they had nothing to do with the drama and that they still like her as a person. But, Giangreco was confused why the girls didn’t like her.



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Months of exclusion and pettiness led to her finally cutting ties. 


Giangreco mentioned that regardless of the petty behavior and intentionally being left out of group chats, she would occasionally see some of the girls alone. She said that whenever it’s just one girl, they would always talk to her and throw small talk discussions at her by saying things like, “How’s life.” Giangreco explained that “she didn’t want to be doing this” and that she knew that they didn’t like her.

After months of being extremely petty with Giangreco and trying to make elevator conversation, she had finally had enough and said, “I don’t want to do this anymore. I know that you guys don’t like me, so I don’t want to do the small talk anymore”.

She then said that the girl had rolled her eyes and seemed upset that Giangreco called her out. Giangreco happily explained that she felt so “liberated” by finally cutting ties with those mean girls. 

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Many others shared their timeless experiences with “mean girls” in the comments.

In the comment section, some women wrote their ages and how they were still dealing with mean girls. 

One woman mentioned, “Most of the time, the people that peak in high school, stay acting like they’re still in high school.” Others agreed with the feeling of liberation and freedom when they stood up for themselves during times like these. 

Despite the positivity within the comments, one person negatively said, “Hmmmm.. idk, there’s 3 sides to a story.. yours, theirs, and the truth! Kinda weird that all of them don’t like you” with many people defending Giangreco.

“Nah. That’s just mean girl dynamics,” one said in defense of Giangreco.


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Group dynamics play a significant role in the ideology of these “mean girls.”

According to a 2023 study published in Evolution and Human Behavior, people tend to prefer friends who are kinder to them than they are to their enemies as this offers a sense of protection — if your friend is "vicious" toward another person, that means you're "in" and the other person is out. That need to feel a sense of belonging doesn't disappear as we become adults, which is why some people sadly never grow out of the mean girl phase. 

Fortunately, it appears as though the age of the popular girl being the meanest one may be coming to an end as Gen Z tend to be more "open-mind­ed, lib­er­al-lean­ing and active­ly engaged in advo­cat­ing for the fair and equal treat­ment of others," according to a review of various studies regarding social issues today.


Overall, Giangreco had finally cut ties with the small talk and toxic relationships and is happy that she does not have to deal with the petty exclusions any longer. 

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Cortney Crowell is a writer and frequent contributor to YourTango from New Jersey who covers entertainment, news, and human interest stories.