Mom Upset Parents Excluded Her Daughter When She Accidentally Crashed Classmate's Party After Not Being Invited
The birthday girl turned her back.
Monkey Business Images/Shutterstock Parents can be super sensitive when it comes to their kids. None of us like to see out kids left out, bullied, or get their precious little feelings hurt.
One mother was especially upset at the treatment her 4-year-old received when she inadvertently crashed a classmate’s birthday party.
The distraught mom took to Mumsnet’s AIBU (Am-I-Being-Unreasonable) forum to ask for advice on how to handle the situation.
She starts with a little background, telling readers that her daughter went to the trampoline park with her sister on a recent Saturday. She had to work, so wasn’t in attendance when her sister took the girl on the excursion.
Her daughter ended up in the park while a classmate was having her party.
By sheer coincidence, the poster’s daughter ran into some of her classmates at the park. They were at one of the girls’ birthday parties and it was clear that the woman’s child had been excluded.
Like any child, the poster’s daughter was excited to see her friends and started playing with them and going back and forth to that table their parents had reserved for the party.
The woman claims, “The birthday girl mum ignored my daughter and literally turn her back on my daughter and offered all the other kids a slice of pizza.”
Her sister took notice of the rejection and removed the girl from the table where she was not welcomed.
Then the parents brought out a birthday cake with Elsa from "Frozen" on it. Because this was the little girl’s favorite character, naturally she began to cry because she was unable to celebrate with her friends.
The mother acknowledges that no one owes her daughter anything.
She said, “I do know she had no obligation whatsoever to include my daughter. But I just find it so rude and cruel to act like this with a 4-year-old, especially being from the same class. I could never do it.”
Now, she’s considering privately messaging the birthday girl’s mother.
Her alternative route is by going a step further and posting a message in the classroom’s parents’ group.
She clarifies that it is possible that the hosts didn’t know who her daughter was, but some of the other parents in attendance at the party recognized her and never spoke up to defend her.
The message would not be a specific call-out, but a general warning letting them know, “We should all be nicer people (clearly she isn’t), maybe to learn something for the future.”
She wants to know if she should just move past the incident and avoid making any waves. She wants to avoid any awkward interactions during after-school pickups.
Commenters are blaming the poster’s sister for keeping her niece in a clearly untenable situation. They believe she should have taken the little girl away to avoid her feelings being hurt.
Users didn't agree entirely with the mom.
One person said, “Sorry but your sister should have kept her away from the party group especially when food and cake was being served.”
They continued their commentary, posting, “It's pretty rude on your part to expect your daughter to have been included when she wasn't invited.”
“Those parties are pretty expensive per head and maybe she only had enough food for those actually invited.”
Another responder agreed and said, “Oh god what an awkward situation. It wasn’t nice for your daughter but to be fair if they were having a party the mum was probably just in the throes of cake for this girl”
The commenter also advised, “I’d take it as a kind of an oversight because she was in that stressed party mode. In the nicest possible way, your sister should have moved your daughter away from there, but I can see how that could have been really hard.”
NyRee Ausler is a writer from Seattle, Washington, and author of seven books. She covers lifestyle and entertainment and news, as well as navigating the workplace and social issues.