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Ex Accuses Mom Who Orders Takeout While Kids Are Asleep So 'She Doesn't Have To Share' Of Being A 'Bad Mom'

Photo: cottonbro studios, Darina Belonogova / Pexels
Kid sleeping, woman eating takeout

Let’s face it, as a parent, finding the alone time to indulge in the things you love is a rare occurrence. Any time you get to unwind and simply be should be celebrated and thoroughly enjoyed.

One woman found herself at odds with her children’s father after they told him she had decided to have a meal without them as they slept.

The upset mom took to the AITA (Am-I-The-A—hole) subreddit to share her frustration over her ex’s reaction to her decision to order takeout food after her kids had fallen fast asleep.

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Her ex is shaming her for ordering takeout behind her kids' backs.

She told readers that she has four children and that after she puts them to bed, she orders herself food from one of the local food delivery services. It’s a time she looks forward to after a long day at work and she does it to enjoy her food without having to share with the little ones.

The woman usually wakes up before her kids and gets rid of all of the evidence, but recently, she was caught in that act.

One morning, the children woke up before their mom and noticed packaging from the takeout meal she’d had the night before. They decided to wake their mother up to ask if there was any left for them and she told them that there was not.

Not thinking much of the conversation, the Redditor dropped the kids off for their customary week at their father’s house. She was shocked when he sent her a barrage of text messages accusing her of “misappropriating” the child support money he sends every month.

According to her, “He also accused me of being a bad mother because I rather order food for just myself without thinking of my children who were with me at the time and that I should've just waited until they were with him for the night.”

Clearly, the dad had some thoughts about how his children’s mother should handle them when they are under her control, which is not uncommon when it comes to co-parents.

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The guilty mom felt the need to explain that after a trying day, she needed something to make her feel better and food usually does that.

The mother of four works at a daycare where she is around kids all day. It’s conceivable that in addition to caring for her own kids, she has the added burden of nurturing the children at her place of work and well. But she wanted to also clarify that she makes her own money.

She explained that her kids’ dad gives her a total of $400 per month for child support but also buys the children things as needed. The co-parents don’t have a child support order in effect but the arrangement has worked up until now.

The frustrated mom also noted that the food delivery would have cost much more had she ordered for everyone and sharing her food would have resulted in her having to go without while the kids ate.

Many parents did not believe she was wrong and shared their own stories of hiding out to eat food without the kids sticking their hands out for some.

The woman was overwhelmingly voted ‘not the a—hole’ and many parents could relate to her circumstances, sharing stories of hiding in the closet to eat M&Ms, hidden “stash” drawers, gym bags full of Thin Mints, and even hiding their favorite snacks from their spouses.

Others took issue with the ‘paltry’ amount of support the non-custodial parent pays every month. One person commented, “This dude needs to shut his piehole and pay more support.”

Raising a child is a costly venture. Though it varies by region, a 2022 survey by Care.com found that on average, it costs $221 per week to take care of each child. And that doesn’t take into consideration the hidden costs that pop up.

Co-parenting can be tough. When two people have differing viewpoints on how to care for their mutual children, it is best to move with grace, good communication, and understanding if things are expected to go smoothly.

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NyRee Ausler is a writer from Seattle, Washington, and author of seven books. She covers lifestyle and entertainment and news, as well as navigating the workplace and social issues.