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Mom Tells 11-Year-Old Daughter She's 'Too Old' To Cuddle & Sit In Her Lap — Now She Wonders If She Was Wrong

Photo: Anastasia Shuraeva | Pexels
mom and daughter cuddling while lying down

How old is too old to cuddle with your parents?

The question was brought up by a mother on Reddit, who is being shamed for admitting that she refused to let her daughter cuddle with her because she felt as if she were too old for such things.

Posting to the subreddit  "r/AmItheA--hole" (AITA) — a forum where users try to figure out if they were wrong or not in an argument that has been bothering them — she explained that her 11-year-old daughter likes to get in her or her husband's lap.

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Mom tells her 11-year-old daughter she's 'too old' to cuddle and sit in her parent's lap.

In her Reddit post, the woman wrote that her daughter is fairly small for her age and because of that, is often treated "like a younger child."

"She loves to hop in my or my husband's lap and cuddle with us on the couch or in a chair," she said.

However, the woman has begun to think that her daughter is a bit too old to be cuddling and trying to sit on her parent's lap and that as a mom, she may be "hurting her" by letting her continue to do so.

She described the latest incident, where her daughter attempted to jump into her lap for a cuddle, but was effectively pushed away.

The 11-year-old girl's mother promptly told her she was "too old" to cuddle and that she needed to "get off" her lap.

"She got really upset, got off me and went to her room, and slammed the door," the woman wrote of her daughter's reaction.

Since then, the woman noticed that her daughter hasn't tried to get in her lap since, and things have been "tense" between them as well.

"She doesn't talk to me unless she has to and when I hugged her goodnight last night she didn't hug me back," she concluded. "I feel really guilty because I obviously hurt her feelings but I feel like she might be too old for sitting on my lap."

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Most people who commented on the woman's Reddit post agreed that she was in the wrong for reprimanding her daughter.

Several Reddit users condemned the mother for scolding her daughter and pointed out that soon enough, her daughter won't want to cuddle her at all.

"You made her feel like she'd done something wrong. People sit [on] their parents' laps at all ages," one user wrote. "She's a child. No wonder she's upset with you."

Another user added, "Your kid obviously loves you and shows love through cuddling up with you guys and feels comfortable."

"What you did by saying this basically makes her feel embarrassed/bad about showing you guys love."

A third user chimed in, "You should have talked to her about it beforehand rather than abruptly telling her to get off."

"With no explanation from you, it’s easy to get confused why something was okay one day and now it’s not. If you’re both okay with cuddling, what’s the problem?"

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Nia Tipton is a writer living in Brooklyn. She covers pop culture, social justice issues, and trending topics. Keep up with her on Instagram and Twitter.