Grieving Woman Worries Over The Perfect Christmas Gift For Her Dying Mother — 'There's A Good Chance She Won't Even Make It To Christmas'

The quality of the time spent together can hold far more significance than the material value of a gift.

 mom and her adult daughter exchanging christmas gifts. Yuganov Konstantin / Shutterstock

While many people find joy in the holiday season, especially being around loved ones and the sense of togetherness that comes along with all of the festivities.

But for those attempting to navigate the multifaceted reality of grief, the holiday season can cast a shadow of melancholy, which is the case for one grieving woman, who admitted that she's struggling with how to make her mother's last Christmas special.


She's worried about what Christmas gift she should get for her dying mother.

In her Reddit post, she explained that she isn't sure what to get her terminally ill mother for Christmas, since this could be the last time they will spend the holiday together.

"My mother doesn't have very long (cancer-life expectancy a matter of months). There's a good chance she won't even make it to Christmas, but if so, it will most likely be her last one," she shared. Her mother is also quite weak due to her illness and doesn't have much energy to do some of the activities that she had previously loved to do, including cooking, crafts, and gardening.


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She acknowledged that she didn't want her mother to spend her last Christmas without any gifts, or just receiving the usual presents of a hat to cover her head from the illness and chemotherapy. "I could only imagine that would make her sadder," she pointed out.

The thought of what Christmas gift to buy her mother didn't normally cross her mind or make her worry as heavily as it is now, but when thinking about it, the thought almost brought her to tears. 

grieving woman worries over perfect christmas gift for dying motherPhoto: fizkes / Shutterstock


People shared ideas for what she could gift her mother for Christmas.

"A memory book to look at together is so nice and wonderful and maybe they could even encourage a note or something for the mom to contribute so when she does pass it can be cherished for the remaining family," one Reddit user suggested.

Another user added, "We decided not to go for sentimental things as our mum really struggled with the fact she was dying and things like that for her were extremely emotional and brought the attention back to the fact she didn't have long left. Obviously, everyone is different so it depends on personal feelings/opinions."

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"I’m so sorry. I’m going through the same thing with my mom. We’re planning more small moments over gifts like going driving to look at Christmas lights with cocoa, watching me ice skate with my son, things like that," a third user chimed in.


"It’s a [messed-up] situation but she’s already expressed she doesn’t want more 'things' that I’ll just have to sort through when she dies. Depressing but there you have it. Hugs and good luck!"

In the final moments shared with a loved one, the quality of the time spent together can hold far more significance than the material value of a gift.

It's understandable that as this woman is working through her grief, she wants to be able to create one last perfect Christmas with her mother, but choosing to spend time with someone and create positive memories can be something that is cherished long after her mother's physical form has passed over.

The face of impending loss can be a scary reality to accept, but instead of trying to say goodbye one last time, she can instead focus on a celebration of life because even in the most disheartening goodbyes, love, and family will always be forever, and that is what should matter most.


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Nia Tipton is a Chicago-based entertainment, news, and lifestyle writer whose work delves into modern-day issues and experiences.