The One Bittersweet Thing Even Barack And Michelle Obama Can't Stop Their Kids From Doing
All kids want to separate from their parents, even when those parents are extraordinary.
Peter Serocki | Shutterstock We tend to think that the children of extraordinary people are somehow fundamentally different from everyone else's kids, but the reality is that humans are humans, and we all follow basically the same path of development.
And as their kids come of age, that's something even Michelle and Barack Obama are learning. In a new interview, the former First Lady described how her daughters, Sasha, 23, and Malia, 26, have become fiercely independent — and largely uninterested in simply resting on the laurels of their history-making parents' footsteps.
Michelle Obama said Sasha and Malia are determined to stay out of their parents' shadow.
Many of us have felt the pressure to fall in line with our parents' legacy, whether that's something small like going into the same family business or something huge like changing who we are to fit their beliefs. Even parenting philosophies have become a point of contention between many adults and their parents these days.
But it's simply a fact of coming of age that you assert your independence, double down on your identity, and go your own way. And despite the outsized and extraordinarily privileged life they've led because of who their parents are, Obama says Sasha and Malia are no different.
During an appearance alongside her brother Craig Robinson on "Sibling Revelry," sibling actors Kate Hudson and Oliver Hudson's podcast, Obama opened up about how her daughters, and Malia in particular, are approaching life now that they're on their own path, and how important it is to them to step outside their parents' oversized shadow.
Obama said the girls' independent streak started while they were living in the White House.
For many kids, moving into the White House might seem like a fairy tale, like Eloise moving into the Plaza Hotel in the iconic storybooks. But Obama told the Hudson siblings that Sasha and Malia weren't interested in that approach, right from the jump.
“They didn’t want to be little princesses in the White House — they wanted to push the envelope,” Obama said. She explained that they wanted to be kept on a longer leash in order to explore and distinguish themselves. "They wanted to try some things. They wanted to be out in the world,” she continued.
And for the former President and First Lady, this meant adjusting their parenting style given the outsized world they were all living in. "I knew that under the circumstances, they needed to have more rope than I probably would have given them if I were my mother," Obama explained.
With this came a pronounced effort to "push away" from their famous parents during their teen years, a dynamic that she said has continued into their adulthood because they are loath to be regarded as just "nepo babies" who've been handed everything they want.
Peter Serocki | Shutterstock | Canva Pro
"You guys know this of children with parents who are known, you're trying to distinguish yourself," Obama said to the Hudson siblings, who are the children of Hollywood legend Goldie Hawn and singer Bill Hudson, and were raised primarily by Hawn and her partner of 42 years, actor Kurt Russell.
“It is very important for my kids to feel like they’ve earned what they are getting in the world," she went on to say. "They don’t want people to assume that they don’t work hard, that they’re just naturally just handed things. They’re very sensitive to that."
Malia Obama has even gone so far as to drop her famous surname professionally.
Having recently graduated from the University of Southern California after studying sociology, Sasha Obama is said to be pursuing a career in tech. Malia Obama, however, is choosing a former public-facing career in the entertainment industry. And it seems to have deepened her motivation toward individuality even more.
So much so that she has dropped her famous surname in her professional work as a writer and director. After beginning her career writing on Donald Glover's Amazon Prime series "Swarm," Obama dropped her last name when she debuted her first short film "The Heart" at last year's Sundance Film Festival, going by just her first and middle names, Malia Ann.
Michelle says she and the former President couldn't help but see some humor in this. "We were like, 'they're still going to know it's you, Malia,'" she told the Hudsons. "But we respected the fact that she's trying to make her way." It's all part of the process of growing up, even when you're the child of an extraordinary legacy.
John Sundholm is a writer, editor, and video personality with 20 years of experience in media and entertainment. He covers culture, mental health, and human interest topics.
