To The Girl Who Feels Replaced By Her Friend's Significant Other

Priorities change as we get older and our life stages impact that as well.

upset woman being comforted by friend PR Image Factory / shutterstock
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By Ashley Allison

Now, I know the title seems daunting, but we’ve all been there. Your best friend finds a guy or girl; they get serious and you feel that you have been replaced to an extent.

Everything revolves around their relationship and not your friendship.

And for those of us who are in our mid-twenties to early thirties, you get where I’m coming from.

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Your best friend is now married and spends all her time with her husband or spouse.

Yes, marriage is totally important and I’m not knocking the tradition... but by the time the honeymoon phase is over, your friends who you’ve spent years with learning secrets and sharing memories are moving on without you.

They assume you’re not available for a girls night. They assume that any time you want to go hang out they can bring their husband, who is a great guy, but you just want girl time. Like the old days.

So to those single women out there who haven’t found someone and feel somewhat “replaced” by their friends’ spouses, I see you.

I’ve been there and I am currently there.

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Priorities change as we get older and our life stages impact that as well. But we need to always keep in mind those who have been there for us through thick and thin.

It’s not common to have girlfriends who you’ve known for more than six or seven years. Or, if you’re really lucky, to still have your childhood best friend by your side!

That’s something we need to appreciate and make sure they know how much it means.

Any “relationship,” whether it be platonic or romantic, takes effort. It is a two-way street! Communication must happen on both ends, we all know this.

Sometimes we, as the best friend, need to voice our feelings without coming across as aggressive or pessimistic.

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It could be that your friend has no idea that you feel isolated! Which is totally valid. Or, maybe she’s been meaning to reach out to you but life has just been hectic; we’ve all been there.

Know at the end of the day that you do hold a very important title in her life. "Best Friend." That is not a term we use lightly in society and is very different from holding the title of spouse.

Two totally different things and expectations, but two or more people who want what’s best for you and are rooting for you 24/7!

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So pick up the phone and text or call your girlfriend. Sometimes we just need a little reassurance over FaceTime or a coffee meetup to know how much we still mean to you.

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Ashley Allison is a nurse, author and writer for Unwritten who focuses on relationships, health and wellness, and family. For more of her content, visit her author profile.