How To Tell You're Becoming Exactly Who You're Supposed To Be

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By Brittany Christopoulos

Being in your twenties is the complete opposite of how you thought it would be when you were a kid. You go from having complete structure and routine to being thrown on your butt on the curb and told, “go live life.”

Where do you even start? You feel so lost and confused about every aspect.

You compare yourself to others because being at the same stage in life as your friends are all you’ve ever known. And guess what, that’s no longer the case.

Age means nothing. But who you are becoming means everything.

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Where do you even start with figuring out who you want to be when you don’t even know what you want to eat for dinner every night? Well, with my experience, and some advice I’ve learned, these are some of the tips I’ve learned over the past few years of being in the real world:

You’re becoming more independent.

It starts with simple tasks like making your own meals and booking your own appointments and slowly but surely you find yourself doing everything on your own.

Gaining your own independence is the first sign to tell you're growing into a person you want to be because you no longer need to rely on others for every single thing (and mini crisis) you experience.

Your opinion on your friends/generation change.

You’ll be out with your friends one night going out to the club and you’ll be having a conversation as always and it’ll just hit you. "Holy crap, I can’t stand when she acts this way, or the way she talks or..." The list goes on.

You might drift away for a bit or cut them off completely, but it’s bound to happen because they’re just not growing at your pace, and you find it hard to tolerate them or maintain a friendship when you’re at such opposite stages of life.

You suddenly don’t feel like you belong in your generation and you become a bitter old person you swore you’d never become.

You recognize issues within yourself and learn how to fix them.

We all have flaws. But when you recognize you have problems such as the way you cope with stress or anxiety, acknowledge them, and work at finding a way to cope, while eventually figuring out how to help yourself and fix it.

It proves you’re maturing in a great way.

You gain your own opinions different than your parents.

We were always raised knowing what we’ve learned, and often we know no different until we start aging. And nothing is more satisfying than speaking your opinion and watching your family’s mouths drop at a heated dinner debate.

You have your own mind and you become confident in sharing it.

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You don't feel like you have enough time.

There will be one night your friends invite you out, and you just can’t bring yourself to get off the couch and go because you are absolutely exhausted. You had a busy week and there just isn’t enough time in the week to possibly get what you need done.

Imagine, you feel swamped and you don’t even have kids yet.

Your priorities start shifting.

Because you have no time (or feel like it), you really have to prioritize certain people and events, and prove to those people that they mean something to you.

You’ll realize it when you cancel plans with the few friends you actually have left so you can go to a family function because you made the decision to.

You aren't afraid to seek advice in a moment of weakness.

As young adults, our parents would tell us we thought we knew everything, and for some things, we honestly thought we did. But you know you’re growing up when you ask for help or advice when you’re feeling lost or upset.

You developed a back bone.

It doesn’t matter if it’s to your parents, your boss or your significant other. You tell people how you feel and you don’t allow yourself to be treated poorly. Plain and simple.

You’re strong, you’re confident, and you’re secure with who you are.

Don’t get me wrong, it’s terrifying trying to define who you are and make your mark in this world. But once you get the hang of it you’ll become so proud of your transformation, and, most importantly, you’ll feel comfortable and happy with who you have become.

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Brittany Christopoulos is a writer, journalist and fill-in TV co-host. She's a Senior Writer and Head of Trending News for Unwritten. Follow her on Twitter.

This article was originally published at Unwritten. Reprinted with permission from the author.