Photo: Sophie Backes via Unsplash
A good man will always do these things for his lady.
By Unwritten — Written on Mar 05, 2020
By Brittany Christopoulos
Finding a good man is hard these days. So when you have one, you really have to hold on tight.
It’s easy to get confused by the hundreds of imposters you’ll become acquainted with during your lifetime. Luckily, there are ways to determine which ones are keepers in this chaotic world.
Basically, if he doesn’t do these basic things in your relationship, you should dump him immediately.
1. Respect you
He doesn’t always have to open the door for you, but he should at least treat you like his equal. He shouldn’t make you feel bad about yourself or degrade you.
Instead, he should be lifting you up and constantly reminding you that your opinions and beliefs are valid. If he doesn’t respect you, leave him.
2. Make an effort
Once you make it official, he shouldn’t stop trying.
He should still initiate dates or spontaneous adventures, surprise you with flowers just because, or do whatever he can to remind you that he loves you and wants your relationship to work.
3. Tell you he loves you
Once it’s openly said (because let’s be real — it’s daunting at first), he’ll always remind you how much he loves you. His communication will be open, honest and never-ending, so he better keep expressing himself to you.
4. Make you laugh
He doesn’t have to be a stand-up comedian, but he should at least make you laugh every once in a while.
Whether it’s a funny comment about something he’s getting passionate about or something stupid that makes you laugh and roll your eyes, there should be something. You should laugh and have fun with your partner.
5. Listen to you
When you talk about things of importance to you or your feelings, he should be all ears. If he cares, he’ll pay attention and will remember those conversations.
Who knows, he might just surprise you every once in a while by remembering something from those old convos.
6. Show you off
He doesn’t have to post endless pictures on Instagram, but he should still hold your hand in public and introduce you to people he knows.
He should be eager to intertwine you with his life and make sure everyone important to him knows who you are, too. If he doesn’t, I’d leave him.
7. Please you in bed
It is the 20s all over again, but it doesn’t mean the 1920s. The world is progressive and he should please you as much as you please him.
One way or another, he’ll find a way and will succeed. If he doesn’t, he’s just selfish, clueless, and an idiot.
8. Comfort you when you need it
He may not know exactly what you need in the moment, but over time, he’ll learn how to comfort you correctly.
He won’t be scared by a few tears. Instead, he’ll pull you in for a hug and listen to what you need to vent about.
9. Try new things
It’s easy to fall into a comfortable pattern in relationships, but that doesn’t mean he shouldn’t try new things.
Whether it’s going to a cooking class just for giggles or going on vacation to a place you want to go to and he doesn’t, he should make the effort to do it with you.
10. Make you feel beautiful
If you feel bloated, are covered in back zits, or have hairy armpits — he should always convince you that you’re beautiful. And when you argue with him on that topic, he’ll stand strong and give you more reasons he finds you gorgeous.
You’ll never doubt that he sees your beauty.
11. Be honest with you
Trust and truth go hand-in-hand when dating, and honesty is always important. He won’t lie, and if he does, he’ll tell you the truth when you confront him.
And chances are, if he’s lying, it’s probably about a surprise he has planned for you. He’ll have nothing to hide otherwise. Dishonesty is a big reason to leave him.
12. Encourage you whenever you need it
He’ll always be your number one cheerleader, and will give you every reason to pursue your dreams, even when you’re deep in doubt. He’s seen your potential, knows your drive, and will convince you that you are capable of anything.
Obviously, some things go unsaid, like being faithful and committed. However, a lot of these other crucial traits need to be emphasized, but often aren’t.
Without them, your relationship is doomed. So if your man doesn’t do these things, you may want to find one that does as soon as you possibly can. Stop wasting your time!
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Brittany Christopoulos is a writer who focuses on relationships, dating, and love. For more of her relationship content, visit her Twitter page.
This article was originally published at Unwritten. Reprinted with permission from the author.