Photo: Instagram
The only time you’ll ever see “Alabama” and “woke” in the same sentence.
By Leah Scher — Written on Aug 04, 2019
Recently, 43-year-old Blink-182 drummer Travis Barker called out 20-year-old Echosmith drummer Graham Sierota for hitting on Barker’s 13-year-old piano-playing daughter, Alabama. Now that we’ve got everyone’s age, name, and affiliation out of the way, what the f**k? How the heck? When the hell? Who is Graham Sierota?
1. Sierota was filling Alabama Barker’s DMs with party invites and compliments.
The first time he reached out via Instagram was in 2016, when Barker was just 10-years-old. It was pretty innocent at first — just a simple “hi.” Except he said it multiple times with no reply from her, which is most definitely borderline creepy. To top it off, he added, “By the way, I’m Graham from Echosmith, and I think you’re beautiful.” Sorry, dude, I tried to give you the benefit of the doubt.
2. He returned to shoot another shot three years later.
Earlier this month he sent her an invite to a barbecue at his house. Reportedly, she responded, “You’re like 40” — which is hysterical, by the way, because is that really how 13-year-olds see people in their 20s? He then wrote back: “I just wanted to say I really like your music and sorry for messaging, and I’m 20.” She savagely retorted: “OK, but you understand I’m a child?”
3. Then she made a public post about it on her story.
“Hey guys!” she began a caption with the screenshots. “So once again I am bringing this to your attention because I’m a 13-year-old girl, and he is 21/20, super creepy,” she captioned the alleged screenshots. As embarrassed as I am on Graham’s behalf, I’m proud of her for putting this out there. Not only does it spread awareness of a potentially dangerous trend, but it also encourages others in her situation to stand up for themselves. People won’t know that their behavior is predatory if you don’t call it out when you see it!
4. Graham has since apologized.
He seems sincere about it, too. He issued a statement to The Daily Beast apologizing for his “predatory” behavior: “I had invited Alabama to my parents’ big family barbecue along with many other people, and it wasn’t until she responded that I realized her age, at which point I apologized to her. I’m really sorry and feel very badly about this. I didn’t realize she was a minor and assumed she was my age. I made a careless mistake, and this is a big lesson for me. I would like to apologize again to Alabama, her dad, Travis, and her family.” Alabama then released a response statement on August 2nd saying, “I am posting on behalf of the drummer of Echosmith. He had dm’d me a while back in 2016 and then once again in July saying I was beautiful and invited me to a BBQ at his house. He is very sorry about the situation and is regretful. I forgive him and would like for this to all be over.” What a sweetie.
5. This is reminiscent of Jesse Lacey from the band Brand New.
This isn’t the first incident of pop-punk adult musicians hitting on teenagers. In the Fall of 2017, during the dawn of the #MeToo era, the singer and guitarist of the Long-Island based band Brand New, Jesse Lacey, confessed to “serial sexual misconduct." One woman, Nicole Elizabeth Garey, shared her story of Lacey soliciting nudes from her when she was 15 and he was 24. He manipulated her, demanded specific poses, settings, and attire, and was aware of what he was doing so he waited until she was 19 to touch her. Another woman, Emily Driskill, was a 16-year-old concert photographer and Brand New fan when Lacey allegedly began pressuring her into sexual situations.
6. Commend the behaviors you want to see!
Many sources that reported on Lacey’s apology call out his “failures” — the failure to mention any of the women he targeted specifically, or “the allegations that he preyed on minors.” It’s important to call out insufficiencies in apologies, but it’s also vital that we recognize people’s efforts to own up to their offenses and change their behaviors. If we want to see improvements in toxic masculinity, we have to applaud their attempts to be better.
Leah Scher is an ENFP finishing her degree at Brandeis University. She's an alumna of the Kenyon Review Young Writer's Workshop the Iowa Young Writers' Studio. She's passionate about Judaism, poetry, film, satire, astrology, spirituality, and sexual health.