Becoming a grown up isn't as great as they say it's going to be.
By Jesse Oakley — Written on Aug 18, 2019
Adulting is the worst. We’ve all thought that at one point or another. You say to yourself, “I wish I could be a kid again. Life was so much easier.” But unfortunately, time doesn’t move backwards. So, here you are, stuck as an adult.
But what does it mean to be adult? Legally, the government considers a person an adult when they turn 18. And yet you can’t drink until you’re 21. Also, most people don’t graduate college until they’re 22. So at what point should you really be considered an adult? With so many life checkpoints, it’s hard to say exactly when that begins.
In my opinion, being a true adult doesn’t really start until you’ve graduated college (if that was your chosen path). When you’re in college, it’s more like you’re a pre-adult. Legally you can do things and by the end you can drink, but you’re still not sure what the best way to do laundry is. It’s like the purgatory of age.
Honestly, I don’t think anybody really knows when they become an adult. It’s something that just sort of happens. One day you wake up and you realize you can’t ride the same roller coasters you used to. Responsibilities like paying bills and work parties pile up and you come to the conclusion that you are officially an adult.
But let’s come back to the question of what does it mean to be an adult. Everyone probably has a different definition. Maybe it’s as soon as you enter the workforce, or maybe it’s as big as buying a house. Whatever you choose to go with, there’s really no one true answer. And really, there doesn’t need to be one. We all have our own way of doing things and approaching life. If everyone did it the same way, life would get pretty boring.
However, if you’re still feeling pretty unsure about being an adult, these words of wisdom about adulthood, growing up quotes and funny adulting memes make things a little more clear.
1. How do you act like an adult?
“It's been very funny to try to act like an adult. Even getting dressed. Every day, I'm like, 'Should I wear a blazer and walk around with an umbrella? Do I carry a briefcase?' Because I'm trying to be some image of the adults I saw on TV growing up.” –John Mulaney
2. Time can be illusionary.
“Time goes by so slowly when you're a child, and then, as an adult, it goes by in the blink of an eye.” –David Lowery
3. Nobody’s certain.
“Adolescents are not monsters. They are just people trying to learn how to make it among the adults in the world, who are probably not so sure themselves.” –Virginia Satir
4. When you mature...
“I believe that maturity is not an outgrowing, but a growing up: that an adult is not a dead child, but a child who survived.” –Ursula K. Le Guin
5. Is 30 the magic number?
“Thirty was so strange for me. I've really had to come to terms with the fact that I am now a walking and talking adult.” –C.S. Lewis
6. While you may technically be adult, not everyone can tell.
“I'm carded for R-rated movies. And I get talked down to a lot. When I try to go rent a car or buy an airplane ticket or other stuff adults do, I get 'Okaaaaaay, honey.' I remember when I was 18, getting crayons in a restaurant.” –Kristen Bell
7. The time of becoming you.
“In my humble opinion, the ages 22 to about 27 are the most critical years of your adult life. It's your time to gestate in the cocoon of becoming.” –Mahershala Ali
8. Decaf, the line between child and adult.
“I ordered a decaf coffee the other night, and I was like, 'Holy crap, I'm an adult.'” –Blackbear
9. You’re never too old for candy.
“I think people always want candy, whether you're a kid or an adult.” –Dylan Lauren
10. Becoming an adult can be surprising.
“Adulthood is like the vet, and we're all the dogs that were excited for the car ride until we realized where we're going.” –Unknown
11. You could just act like adulting isn’t a thing.
“Adulthood does not exist. Man is an eternal child.” –Nelson Rodrigues
12. Similar to a ton of bricks.
“Adulthood is like looking both ways before you cross the street and then getting hit by an airplane.” –Unknown
13. Becoming an adult really isn’t much better.
“I always looked forward to being an adult, because I thought the adult world was, well—adult. That adults weren’t cliquey or nasty, that the whole notion of being cool, or in, or popular would case to be the arbiter of all things social, but I was beginning to realize that the adult world was as nonsensically brutal and socially perilous as the kingdom of childhood.” –Peter Cameron
14. At least you have the opportunity to truly explore your passions.
“One of the greatest struggles of becoming an adult is figuring out what you want to do and what makes you happy. The courageous thing is to stick with it and see it through and see if you were correct.” –Kristen Stewart
15. You can also have all the pets.
“The real reason I had wanted to grow up, the main reason I had been willing to even consider becoming an adult, was so I could have as many pets as I wanted.” –Betsy Byars
16. A moment of realization.
“So, I'm 34. I'm kind of becoming an adult - kind of, I guess. But I know that I am because, the other day, I said to somebody, 'Dude, dude, don't - those are the good plates.” –Greg Behrendt
17. Being in your 20s is a weird time.
“I've heard this before from people: early 20s kind of screws with your head a little bit because you're transitioning into adulthood and actually becoming an adult with responsibilities and paying bills. So all of a sudden, it's like you're responsible now.” –Dan Byrd
18. It’s just one big improv show.
“I don’t think I’d have been in such a hurry to reach adulthood if I’d known the whole thing was going to be ad-libbed.” –Bill Watterson
19. Remembering you’re an adult, but...
“That horrifying moment when you’re looking for an adult and you realize that you are an adult. So you start looking for an adultier adult.” –Unknown
20. Sponges determine adulthood.
“You know you're an adult when you get excited about a new cleaning sponge at the kitchen sink.” –Unknown
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Jesse Oakley is a writer who writes about love, relationships, self-care and spirituality/astrology.