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Will you have to be the first to say the relationship is over?
By Emily Ratay — Written on Jul 03, 2018
Sometimes you know a relationship is over and it seems like it's only a matter of time when one of you calls it quits. But there's a part of you that would prefer not to be the person who becomes the barer of bad news.
Breaking up with someone is hard business. Not all of us can look someone we care deeply about (or used to care about) right in the eyes and break up with them without feeling something.
It can feel like you're letting them down; like everything you said you'd be for them was just a lie because now you're just doing a 180 and ending it. And that's only if you're the one doing the breaking up.
If you're being broken up with, you're met with different, but just as many, emotions as your partner tells you that this isn't working anymore. So, clearly, breaking up with someone is really hard.
But if you're unhappy, then you know it has to be done. You might be the first to explain that things aren't working out or wait for that moment when they're unhappy and will break up with you as soon as they come to grips with the fact that the relationship isn't worth the hassle anymore.
Other zodiac signs can't bear to pull the trigger and end the relationship because they don't want to be known as the "bad guy" who ended things.
So, they let themselves be a part of a crappy relationship until you wise up and end things. Look, as hard as the actual breaking up part is, no one deserves to stay in an unhappy relationship just because they feel like it's better than hurting someone's feelings.
I heard somewhere once that you don't have to set yourself on fire just to keep other people warm.
Basically, that means that you don't have to make yourself uncomfortable just so that other people don't have to experience discomfort.
So, if you're staying in a relationship just because you know it would crush your partner – but you're still incredibly unhappy with this person – you're not doing anyone any favors (especially yourself) by refusing to end it just because it'll hurt the other person's feelings; you're not responsible for anyone but yourself.
And when you do finally make it to the breakup and actually go through with it, then you're on your way to a much happier future, even if it hurts right now.
A lot of the time, we put off breaking up with someone – at least, right away – because of this fear of being uncomfortable.
We might ask someone for advice, but it's never really advice we're after, is it? More often than not, we're asking permission; we want someone to tell us it's okay to break up with our partner.
Whether we take this "permission" to heart and eventually do the breaking up, or we wait for our partner to do it for us, all lies in what's most comfortable for us – and how astrology plays a part in our love life, as zodiac signs.
Keep reading to find out how likely he is to break up with you (vs. the horoscope signs who will wait for you to pull the trigger), according to astrology.
1. ARIES (March 21 - April 19)
The time you'll spend with Aries will be genuine – that much is true. But when things have run its course, it's likely he will know before you do. Aries isn't the kind of guy to totally shut down when he realizes the relationship is over. He'd much rather be upfront with you and break up.
Aries is a very passionate and present partner. When he's with you, he's always living in the moment. He'll be honest about his feelings with you no matter what, as well. That might mean one day he can't stop telling you he loves you and the next that he thinks this has run its course. When Aries knows this relationship is over, he's very decisive about it; no avoiding it.
2. AQUARIUS (January 20 - February 18)
Aquarius always tends to hold everyone in his life at arm's length, including those he's dating. Just because it might seem like he's not totally into the relationship doesn't mean he isn't. Aquarius just loves a little differently than all the other zodiac signs – you need to give him the benefit of the doubt!
One thing Aquarius isn't uneasy about, however, is ending the relationship. He believes in logic over feeling in relationships and knows that once things stop making sense, it's probably over. Aquarius isn't going to wait for you to take the hint; he'll break up with you first. Expect it to be pretty business-like. Once he stops having feelings for you, he doesn't care about being kind.
3. VIRGO (August 23 - September 22)
Virgo spends a lot of time making sure that the relationship he's in is one that is going to last for a long time. Even if it doesn't end up lasting, Virgo still takes his time when deciding if you're the one he wants to be with. When you do date Virgo, you can tell that he deeply cares for you because he is one of the most real zodiac signs out there.
Of course, all of this picking and choosing on Virgo's part probably makes him seem a little guarded, even when he is in a relationship with you. It can be hard to tell if he's really into you or not, but one thing is for sure – when he stops feeling the spark, he won't hesitate to break it off. It will probably come as a shock to you, but Virgo has been planning this for a while.
4. CAPRICORN (December 22 - January 19)
Capricorn knows what he wants in a partner, so chances are if he's chosen you, you're pretty darn special. He doesn't waste his time with people who just want something casual or aren't as into the relationship as he is, that's for sure. That said, love is a tricky thing – and Capricorn eventually deals with breakups just like everyone else.
Capricorn will take the lead on the breakup and will be very firm about it. Actually, not to creep you out, but he can sometimes sound like a parent when breaking up with you. I'm not saying he'll go so far as to shake his finger at you while telling you what you did wrong, but he'll probably use the words "disappointed" and "it's for the best" a lot.
5. SAGITTARIUS (November 22 - December 21)
Sagittarius has never really been one to get serious with someone, so for him to break up with you shouldn't be all that big a shock. I mean, it'll still suck because he's an amazing and super fun partner, but he's also very much a free spirit – nothing and no one can tie him down.
Sagittarius and commitment don't really mesh well together. If he finds someone he's really interested in, he'll try to make it work, but more often than not, he's more comfortable keeping things casual. He won't try to be the first in line when it comes to breaking up with you, but when things have run their course, he will be the one to pull the trigger and break it off.
6. TAURUS (April 20 - May 20)
Taurus is a very hopeful zodiac sign when it comes to love. He wants things to work out and will do whatever he can to make sure that you and he are very happy together, but he's also a realist. He knows that life happens, and that love isn't something you can always do blindly.
Taurus will only break up with you first if he isn't 100 percent happy with the relationship. If he just knows that this isn't going to get any better, he'll end it. But if he's still trying to look on the bright side (and doesn't see that you're just as unhappy), you will have to be the one to end it. Trust me when I say that breaking up is not something Taurus wants to do, but sometimes it has to happen.
7. LIBRA (September 23 - October 22)
Whether or not Libra breaks up with you first all depends on the situation. He needs mutual love – something that is equally as strong within you as it is within him. If he doesn't feel like you are bringing as much to the relationship as he is, he will break up with you. If he doesn't feel like he's as dedicated to you as you are to him, he'll understand if you want to end it.
All of that said, it is much easier for Libra to pretend like nothing is wrong than actually go through with the breakup. He has a tough time with confrontation in almost every other situation, and a breakup isn't any different. He might try to sweep the real problems under the rug or work his butt off to keep things perfect, but when all is said and done, he can only do so much.
8. PISCES (February 19 - March 20)
Pisces is not one to break up with you first because he likes believing that anything can be forgiven in a relationship – even if it takes a toll on him in the process. Pisces wants the fairytale relationship that only comes when you're totally honest with yourself and your partner – rather than just letting things happen and hope for the best.
Pisces is the kind of zodiac sign who forgives very easily. He might be thinking that the relationship isn't going to last, but he will still put you first and let you make the ultimate decision. Only in the direst situation will he initiate the breakup.
9. LEO (July 23 - August 22)
Leo is not the kind of person to break up with you first – or at all if he can swing it – because he believes in true love. He knows that relationships aren't always going to be easy and if he broke up with every partner he ever had an argument or misunderstanding with, he would have stopped believing in love a long time ago.
Leo is the partner you stick with through thick or thin – not someone you toss to the curb after you get bored. If anyone has to break up with anyone, it's going to be you. Leo knows how to fight for his relationship and his partner, but he also knows that things come to an end. It'll probably be up to you to do the ending, though.
10. CANCER (June 21 - July 22)
Cancer hates the "b" word so much that he would rather live in blissful ignorance than face the fact that not every relationship can stick around forever. He likes the idea of finding The One, but he knows that he needs to date a few wrong people before he can find the right person.
Cancer is probably not going to be the one to break up with you first (or at all) because he's just not that kind of person. He has a hard time letting go of people, and breaking up with someone means having to remove them from his life for good. He'll let you take the lead, but beware: he's going to make it very hard for you to break up with him and not feel badly about it.
11. GEMINI (May 21 - June 20)
Gemini is one of those zodiac signs who tries to avoid confrontation as much as possible. He might be great at communication when he's in a relationship, but when things take a turn for the worst, he's not interested in speaking up and hashing it out – go figure.
Gemini will be the guy who pretends like things aren't as bad as they seem – and if he doesn't think the relationship is on its last legs, then that means he doesn't have to be the one to do the breaking up. Makes sense, right? He'll keep his true feelings to himself and hope that you either take the lead and break it off or just ignore it forever like he does.
12. SCORPIO (October 23 - November 21)
Scorpio is a very fierce partner and someone who isn't likely to let you go just because things aren't going perfectly. He is the partner you want by your side if you want someone who will constantly prove to you just how much he loves you.
But, when things go wrong, Scorpio doesn't want to be a part of it. Sure, he'll acknowledge that something has to change, but he certainly won't be the one to do it. He is the type of zodiac sign that has a hard time letting things end. He doesn't move on very quickly, so just because a breakup is imminent doesn't mean he'll want to accept it and move on. It's up to you to make it clear to him that it's over.
Emily Ratay is a full-time writer living in Pittsburgh. She's passionate about the environment and feminism, and knows that anything is possible in the right pair of shoes. She plans on writing a non-fiction book in the future.