The Craziest Lies Men Tell (According To 2,000 Very Angry Women On Facebook)

Photo: Roman Samborskyi / Shutterstock
The Most Common Lies Men Tell According To 2,000 Women On Facebook

Men. We can’t live with them and we can’t live without them. But boy, do we sometimes wish we could live without them.

Sure they’re great most of the time (depending on which woman you ask). They bring happiness and joy into our lives, along with plenty of laughs.

These guys are fantastic at putting together our furniture and "mansplaining" things to us in super simple terms (wink wink) when we ask them a question, and we love being in relationships and having someone to share all the ups and downs with ... but what about when THEY are the ones creating all the downs?

To a large number of us women, it really seems like men are not afraid to lie about anything. Nothing is off topic, and everything is excusable. 

Just ask these thousands of women who commented on a simple question — "Name the top lie men tell" — we posted to our Facebook page. 

Their responses did not disappoint.

According to these ladies (and a few men who also decided to participate), men lie about who they’re talking to, who they’ve slept with, who they’re sleeping with now (just you, he promised!), where they’ve been all day ... even if they liked your cooking! Ouch. 

Are they trying to spare our feelings by telling us these lies? Maybe. Are we being helicopter girlfriends and not giving them enough space to be themselves, and privacy? Maybe. But maybe — just maybe — in all these situations honesty is just the best policy.

If we're honest from the very beginning in our relationships, there will be so much less to lie about in the future.

These kinds of responses make us wonder — do men know that being lied to absolutely sucks? It hurts so much and takes such a long time to move past, especially in relationships. 

You'd think they know because apparently, they hate being lied to just as much as we do (don't get ahead of yourself, ladies. Men aren’t the only ones lying around here). It’s just that men’s lies seem to be way crazier and extreme. Or at least it seems that way from the insane number of responses we've read through.

RELATED: How To Tell If Someone Is Lying To You

Don’t believe us? Check out the post and allllllllll the responses here

Over 2,000 comments later, we’ve compiled a list of the most common — and downright craziest — lies men have told women. Women came out in full force, holding nothing back, to share with us the lies they hear all too often, so here are a few of the responses that just blew us away:

1. Is this really how long he lasts in bed? 

Get us all excited for nothing

2. PLEASE stop procrastinating, boys. 

We'll be reminding them until we are the ones who end up doing it. 

RELATED: 8 Sneaky Ways To Catch A Liar

3. Oh you forgot, huh? Yeah. Right.

We just asked for help with one thing.

4. To straight up lie about your wife DYING of breast cancer is WRONG on so many levels. 

Is this guy for real?

5. No, good sir, you are certainly NOT Vin Diesel. Sorry.

At least she didn't fall for this one. 

6. All sweet nothings. Literally. Sweet. Nothings.

Guys can be so unoriginal sometimes. 

7. How about NOT lie about wanting to be exclusive when you are so obviously not?

Can you just make up your mind?

8. You ACTUALLY expect this poor woman to believe you used a condom to play with children? Gross on so many levels.

This is just ridiculous. 

RELATED: The 4 Most Damaging Types Of Lies For A Relationship

9. What a horrible coincidence, you being half naked on top of another woman. But I still think it's time to go.

No, you don't get points for 'creativity'. 

10. If you're not ready for a relationship, don't SAY you're ready for one.

All you're doing is disappointing us more than you already are. 

11. Husbands. Stay away from her ice cream. Trust us... she will know it's you.

The things we love are off limit. 

12. This guy is low, low, LOW. Really? Wife died in Iraq and he's home with the kids? Honestly awful.

This isn't a lie you hear every day. 

13. There are better places to play pool than at a strip club. Really.

Oh boy.

14. Don't lie and say you're hardly drinking when you come drunk. Honestly.

Boys will be boys, right? 

15. Yikes. Trust is hard to come by when you're not using protection while you have sex. Do better, dude.

So just don't break it to begin with! 

16. Wow... scratch marks are a solid indicator of a boy who needs to be single.

What was the animal's name? 

17. Does cooking entail turning the oven or the stove on? If so then this guy is l-l-l-lying.

Take-out doesn't count as cooking. 

18. Listening is hard for many, many men. You're not alone in this.

We know you weren't. 

19. Ouch, using the marriage vows as a time to lie is HARSH.

That's one heck of a lie. 

20. Don't we ALL want honesty in our relationships?

Yet you're the one not being honest.

21. If you think you aren't ready for commitment, then just say it. You want to be with other people. Plain and simple.

And it's a sad truth.

22. If I'm better off with you, then why are we having this conversation?

I'm not too sure about that one. 

23. Honestly this sounds more like a typical girlfriend's lie, but we'll roll with it. Men can be indecisive, too.

And then they just complain. 

24. Isn't this what we heard on Jerry Springer every episode? Except usually he's wrong.

Catch this one on the next season of Maury.

25. Don't lie about standing up for women's rights if you're uninterested. We can handle things on our own, thank you very much.

And this lie is not going to fly. 

26. Why even have this discussion? If you're intending on having sex (or pressuring her to do so), she knows. No need to beat around the bush.

They shouldn't even have said anything. 

27. Why would she believe you? The history tells all.

You should get points for catching them in a lie. 

28. Oh wow. Cousins, huh? Maybe we should just leave it at that and move forward. Apart.

Seems like a close family.. 

29. Shaggy said it best. But it didn't work out for him either. Better stick to the truth.

Lies, lies, lies. Not worth it.

30. Why lie about your height? We can SEE you.

It's kind of obvious when you lie.

Kelcey Connors is a frequent contributor to YourTango.