When You Like Someone, Stop Playing It Cool And TELL THEM

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Why You Need To Tell Someone You Like Them As SOON As You Can

By Adam Tan

I’ve never been one to judge another person’s fashion sense, but one thing though—and I swear I am doing my absolute best to remain less cheesy—is that I believe in wearing my heart of hearts out there on my sleeve for the world to see.

I tell people that I like them almost as soon as the feeling kicks in or when I find myself constantly thinking of them. I also break it off with people the moment I get the notion that things will not work out in the future.

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Impulsive much? Maybe.

Hear me out first; I’ve been told a million times that it is a dangerous way to be. There is this amount of time that should pass before I do anything drastic. I’ve been told to be chill. Well, with all the relationships that have passed, I can humbly say that I am not a believer of the chill movement. I tried and the thing is, after all the effort I made to keep things casual, I realize that’s not exactly how my system works.

I believe that the first time you meet someone, you already have an idea as to where they stand in your life.

The thought that I am trying to pass is why waste time when you like the person? Why play it cool when things are anything but? Why give the other person another chance when you’ve already made up your mind on how you feel towards them? Can we just remove all the politics from romance and tell the other person how we feel so we can rest our minds or move on to something better?

There is the argument of timing being crucial. Well, if there was a means to figure out when that best timing is then maybe I’d agree with that, but unfortunately for us, such means do not exist. As said by one Robin Scherbatsky: “Timing is a bitch”.

We could put all our faith in destiny that someway somehow, the universe is going to present us with an open door and then everything that we have waited for would have been worth it.

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Now that’s cheesy—and that is a larger risk since you’re simply waiting, and whether you’d like to admit it or not, you’re investing in something that could have a possibility of being nothing.

You could argue that you’re simply testing the waters until you’re pretty sure that this is what you really want. Well, I believe that testing the waters isn’t as simple as that; there is still some investment involved in the process because deep inside of you, you are actually hoping that the whole thing ends up well, that the person possibly is the all famous entity known as “the one”. 

Here’s a more logical assessment.

Personally, I do not believe in THE ONE. I believe in putting yourself out there because come on, I know we’ve been told that it is our feelings that truly matter in romance but we need to be a bit logical with our feelings here.

If the person does not feel the same way you do, what are the chances of things changing in a few years especially with the mindset these days that people can be easily replaced? Social media has reduced the value of spending time with loved ones. The modern way of asking for a date has been reduced to a swipe on our phones.

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The point of this article isn’t to shoot down romantics. In fact, I’d encourage you to be romantics. In a world that’s constantly denying its romantic tendencies as a defense mechanism, we need more romantics now than ever.

The message I am trying to convey is that we need to stop beating around the bush and just say things that need to be said regardless of what the standards dictate because that kind of thinking isn’t reckless. It’s simply being human.

This article was originally published at The Good Men Project. Reprinted with permission from the author.