Love

Two Things That Attract Strong, Independent Women (& Have Nothing To Do With Your Looks!)

Whether you're first trying to "get the girl" or you're already married to her, attraction is important to keep up. And we're not talking just looks here, though taking care of your body can help.

Just because you're married and she promised to love you forever, doesn't mean you should stop trying to be attractive to your spouse. In fact, making sure she wants you may be even more important after you've been together for years.


RELATED: Study Says He Feels Most Attracted To You When You Do THIS


The problem is that things change. Life becomes stressful. Baggage accumulates between you two. Physical intimacy becomes de-prioritized. 

On top of that, times are changing for all of us! The woman you're with is probably a lot stronger and more independent than the generation of women before her. While it used to be that women needed men for financial security and protection, to earn and provide for them, that's no longer the case. Now, strong women are more independent than ever.

They don't need a guy.

So if the modern strong woman doesn't need a guy, how can men make themselves more attractive so women want them? What do women really look for in a man?

This is the very topic Senior VP of YourTango ExpertsMelanie Gorman, asked a group of Experts in our YourTango Expert video above. 

The responses — from Experts Melissa WhiteKira GouldJohn Gray, and Susan Bratton  — offer two simple tips for how a husband (or any man) can become more attractive to a strong, independent woman.

There are two key things strong women look for in a man that make him more attractive:

1. Show her you can take care of her.

Notice the word can — not need.

A strong woman may not need anyone to protect her — after all, she can slay her own dragons. But that doesn't mean she wants to be in control every second of every day.

Need somewhere to start in being the hero with a woman you're dating?


RELATED: If You Have Even One Of These 8 Traits, CONGRATS! You're A Strong Woman


Try being the one to bring a condom on a date. Seems simple, yes. But women now feel like the responsibility is on them to carry it with them when they go out. If you bring one, you're not only showing her you think she's sexually attractive, but that you are able to provide (at the very least, a condom of your own).

Now THAT will turn her on! There is nothing sexier than a man who can provide, even if we don't need him to.

2. Have a passionate purpose to your life.

Be ambitious and passionate about something (other than her, of course), whether it's your aspirations for work or dedication in learning to play an instrument.

Why do you think women like musicians and actors? Ok yeah, part of it is looks... but it's also because the passion a guy can show while strumming his guitar can be the same passion he strums for you.

So find something that drives and move you. Something authentic.  

Soon, you'll see how much more attractive women will find you when your lit by an internal flame. Even if that woman is your wife. 

It might sound like these two steps are too easy to work, but trust the Experts. They know what they're talking about, and they have even more advice to share in the video above!


RELATED: How To Fix A Sexless Marriage Before It's Too Late


If you are having trouble with relationships, sex, attraction or anything else, please visit the websites of our Experts and contact KiraSusanJohn, and Melissa directly. They’re here to help.