Love

The Difference Between Giving Up And Knowing When You've Had Enough

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Are You Giving Up On Love Or Have You Finally Had ENOUGH?

I've been accused many times of being cold hearted. 

Usually it's by my ex-boyfriends, so the reasoning behind this harsh accusation is somewhat understanding.

I mean, I guess you have the right to be mad at me for breaking up with you on New Years Eve. Right before a big party. My bad. 

But not every time is that term warranted. While breakups can seem to out of the blue for everyone on your newsfeed, it's hardly ever that way between the two in the relationship.

In fact, coming to the terms and deciding to breakup can be a process that takes weeks — or even months. 

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And while the decision to spilt can take time, it's important to recognize if you're putting in any effort to reconcile  — or if you even want to. It really comes down to your own desires about the relationship. 

Giving up means you don't want to try.

Even if there's a possibility that things could get better, that you both could change and have a happy sustainable relationship.

You no longer want to be in the relationship, so there is no point in trying to be. 

Knowing when you've had enough means you've put in all the effort. You've done your time, you've seen the couple therapist, you've read the books and you've tried every little possible thing to make the relationship better — because you wanted it to be better.

But a person can only hit so many walls and take so many rejections before they give up. That capacity is up to you. 

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Neither mindset is right or wrong, but both speak volumes about how much importance you place on the relationship.

That in itself you should tell you how much time to invest in making things better or in leaving and finding happiness on your own. 

While no choice is wrong, the choice is yours. 

Emily Blackwood is a writer and editor who focuses on relationships and pop culture.