Relationships: How Do I Learn To Argue Like An Adult?

If fighting with your spouse brings out the wounded teenager in you, Crystal Andrus can help.

grunge man and woman arguing

Does fighting with your boyfriend or husband bring out the worst in you? When you get upset or angry, do you lash out like a rebellious teenager? Are you worried that you might eventually say or do something you will later regret? Good news: you're not alone.


In this video, women's advocate, founder of the SWAT Institute and YourTango Expert Crystal Andrus offers advice about how to keep your inner-teenager in check when fighting with your significant other. 

"The truth is," says Crystal, "every one of us has a wounded part of us that — when we're in those stressful situations — often comes out." So, what can you do about it? "What I recommend," she advises, "is that you give [your inner teenager] a chance ... give her an opportunity ... let that 15-year-old write a letter to everybody who's ever hurt her." That way, you can confront your anger head on instead of taking it out on the one you love.


Want to learn more? Check out the video above.