Self, Sex

Lesson Of The Day: Don't Use Plan B As Your Only Birth Control

plan b

Even if you're not addicted to the world of spunky "lady blogs," I'm sure you've at least heard of the controversy over at xoJane.com about their writer Cat Marnell's favorite form of birth control. If you're late to the party and don't have the addiction that some of us do (lucky you), then let's back up for a sec.

xoJane's "Health Editor," a term we're going to use very loosely, wrote a piece about why she prefers the Plan B method of birth control to all others. Why? Well, in her words, the Pill will make her "fat," make her "spot," and according to her, will not prevent her from getting preggers because she's in that teeny-tiny minority who got knocked up on it. Congrats, Cat! I am, too! Wanna start a club? I mean, we do, in your words, live in an "abortion-friendly culture," after all. No one has ever struggled to gain the right over their own uterus… no, no… not EVER. Hell, they're giving away free abortions around the corner from my apartment and you get a bunny-shaped balloon on the way out the door. So friendly! 

From there, this "Health Editor" proceeds to list a bunch of other forms of birth control and why they're just not for her. Condoms? Pfft! Who needs 'em? It's not like they protect against STDs and pregnancy or anything. Depo-Provera shot? That shizz is just going to fatten you up, too — and on and on. Her piece reads like she's a drunken 19-year-old who has somehow never taken a sex education class in her life. She's gotta be at least 22, in which case she really ought to know better, and we're pretty sure she's partly doing it to make us laugh/cringe and partly for page views, as The Gloss' Jennifer Wright aptly noted. Wright also called Cat a "reckless idiot." You can always count on Ms. Wright to call a spade a spade. The 6 Newest Birth Control Options

But Jen isn't alone in being outraged. The Frisky and Gawker were both outraged at this woman's attempt to...what? What was she trying to prove? 

When exactly did Plan B become a trend? Did I not get the memo? When did women, besides Cat, who admits to having used it three times in one month (holy moly, Batman!), start relying on this as a main means of "protecting" themselves from unwanted pregnancy? And what the crap is so bad about condoms? They're more uncomfortable for the guy, anyway. 

Maybe this was Cat's first foray into satire, or maybe she thinks in writing something so obtusely insensitive (yeah, let's just say abortions are "terrible" and move on to the next topic...like, what?!) she'll shock people into thinking twice about how they practice safe sex. Honestly, I can't say for sure. What I can say is that no one is perfect; we've all messed up when it comes to safe sex, and if you meet someone who says they use a condom every time, they're probably lying. However, to address something as important as reproductive rights in such a flagrant manner is distasteful and obnoxious. It tells all the anti-choice conservatives that women who use Plan B are thoughtless twits. But hey, some people get off on being attacked by the Internets and having their 15 minutes… congrats, Cat! We all just gave you three of that 15 minutes. Better luck next time.

Update: Tiffany's has made a necklace that looks like birth control. This blogger says they should send it to xoJane