Sex Survey: 78% Of Marrieds Want Better Sex

couple in robes in bed
Love, Sex

We asked and you answered: More than 800 people took YourTango's recent sex survey, giving us loads of fascinating information about who's having sex, how often they're having it, and how satisfying it is when it happens.

It turns out 70 percent of you in relationships (those who are married, engaged or taken) have sex at least once a week. Hooray! On the flipside, it seems like many of you want more sex than that, with 41 percent of women and 62 percent of men reporting they want more sex than their partners do. Additionally, 37 percent of those in relationships report being "very satisfied" with their sex lives and 41 percent say they're "somewhat satisfied"—revealing that 22 percent of those in relationships are "not very" or "not at all" satisfied with their sex lives.

Last week saw the release of the National Sex Survey, which offered many interesting, quantitative facts about what Americans are doing in bed, including that 85 percent of men believed they'd given their partner an orgasm during their last sexual encounter, while only 65 percent of women reported having reached orgasm during their most recent encounter. YourTango's survey asked our respondents (70 percent female, 30 percent male) to dig deeper and give us the qualitative details. As the our survey results show, both men and women agree they could be having more frequent and better sex.

Though married sex often gets a bad rap, our survey revealed the majority of married couples are still having sex once a week (66 percent) and 43 percent of them are having sex 3-4 times a week. Still, only 22 percent of married respondents say they are "very satisfied" with their sex lives. Check out the chart below to see how married satisfaction levels stack up.

Some of our other findings:

  • 66% of people 45 and older are having sex at least once a week
  • 74% of those under age 35 report having sex at least once a week
  • 21% of men and 34% of women report being "very satisfied" with their sex lives
  • 15% of men and 12% of women report being "not at all satisfied" with their sex lives
  • 41% of women and 63% of men report wanting more sex than their partners
  • 9% of women and 2% of men report wanting less sex than their partners
  • 38% of women and 26% of men report wanting the same amount of sex as their partners

We launched the sex survey in conjunction with our 31-Day Better Sex Challenge—a month of daily sex advice from YourTango Experts, our network of therapists, coaches and other relationship professionals. Experts like John Gray, author of Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus and TV regular Dr. Diana Kirshner joined forces with 29 other Experts to help bring daily, actionable, holistic advice for better sex. We at YourTango aim to help readers live their best love lives—and experts agree that much of both our personal and relationship happiness is tied into a healthy, vibrant sex life.

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If you're not already following the sex challenge, don't worry, you can jump in at any time. Each expert post comes with three special "action items," for you to practice in your own life starting "today," "this week" and "this month." Because what good is advice if it's not put into action?